Gurlz nowadays, look at em! Swearing, tattoos, wearing men's trousers instead of purty dresses. Bring back the charm school, I sez! Like what Bess Rothman used to do in the '50s and '60s: have girls walk around with books on their heads so that they could learn to move gracefully, like proper ladies. As Miss Rothman's authoritative male announcer sez on her "Charm With Cents" record:
"Poor posture habits might even be keeping YOU from getting dates. Or be the reason your husband is looking to trimmer, slimmer figures."
This is one of my all-time favorite spoken-word records. It's an amazing time-capsule of the pre-Women's Lib era, as well as an entertaining production, what with it's lush piano music, and occasional use of dramatic echo on the announcer's voice. I've used it in sound collages, mash-ups, and dj mixes from the moment I bought it for a buck or so at a garage sale in the '90s. And it's a good thing I did buy it then, because I certainly couldn't afford it now. It's one of my secret weapons, but now I pass it on to you, dear Maniacs. And ladies, when you nab Prince Charming, remember who to thank, 'nkay?
Bess Rothman's Charm With Cents
2. Importance of Speech
3. Visual Poise
4. Theory of Color