ANOTHER WEIRD-ASS CHRISTMAS

Our pal Cat A. Waller has assembled another great batch of oddities, novelties, and cheese with a yule-time spin and I'd love to break it down for you, but Cat fears the copyright nazis, and would rather you just download this beast and check it out for yourself. Actually, a lot of it is quite old, so it's probably ok, but hey, can't be too careful nowadays. I can tell you that it's ingredients include: polka, lounge, the voice of Mr Magoo, holiday hillbillies, some helpful radio Public Service Announcements, some vintage burlesque naughtyness, a well-known indie rock band covering a song-poem, and a quite inexplicable number about a prog-rock star in his own winter wonderland. A wildly entertaining assortment that helps to make the season bright.

Cat's other collections, and a great discovery (The Ghostly Trio album) are also available here:

Cat A. Waller's Xmas mixes

Thanks, Cat!

Party Like It's Only $19.99

What better way to note the shockingly sudden passing of Prince then with this 1999 release by mashup pioneers the Evolution Control Committee? Prince, and in particular his song "1999," serve as the jumping-off point for all manner of avant-tard shenanigans. The ECC (recording under a number of phony "band" names) are joined by such sample-sound stars as Wobbly (doin' the John Oswald 'plunderphonics' thang), Wayne Butane with another one of his funny sound collages, Realistic, and Fossil aka Pea Hix of the great Optigonally Yours, who remind us that Van Halen's "Jump" is kind of a "1999" rip-off. ECC's own tracks range from Weird Al-ish parodies, such as the Oktoberfestive "Polka Like It's 1999," to dense, challenging noise-fests.

Party Like It's Only $19.99 

Listening to this album is an appropriate way to memorialize another great who died today, Richard Lyons, one of the founders of the legendary culture-jamming collagists Negativland. They don't have a track on this disc, but their influence is certainly all over it. Since Don Joyce has also died within the past year, I wonder if the band will continue. Maybe they should recruit some of the talent featured here. Or People Like Us, or The Bran Flakes. Or me! Can I join?!

HUBBA HUBBA!: The Big Band Beat of Bad Girls and Burlesque

Back up by request: Roky Erickson's kids party, and "Carnival in Paradise."

Seeing as how our previous collection of mid-century sleazy-listening music is, by a wide margin, the most popular post of the year so far, I guess I'd better keep feeding you cool cats and crazy kitties more rarities and vinyl obscurities from the Golden Age of Bad Taste:

In the heydey of burlesque, dancin' goils twirled their tassels and bumped their rumps to live bands, not to a dj playing Salt n Pepa or Motley Crue. MCs, specialty acts, and comedy teams were also on the bill if for no other reason than to keep up the pretense that these were "variety shows" - something for everyone! - and not just lewd displays of wanton flesh. Tho the burlesque show format may have been created to skirt (so to speak) the censors, it ended up working quite well as an all-around entertainment package, surviving to this day. There's probably a 'burly-q' revival show near you now.

But this stuff is from the original era, the 1940s - 1960s (I'm aware that burlesque preceeds the '40s, I just don't know of any earlier music). The first track is  apparently   recorded live "in the field" from an album called "Burlesque Uncensored." I was gonna post the whole album, but it's actually in print thru Smithsonian Folkways (your tax dollars at work?)

Apart from the expected bump-and-grind jazz, there's also some wild early rock n roll, exploitation movie radio ads and dialogue, low-budget lounge combos, and show-tunes (e.g. Natalie Wood in "Gypsy," the Gyspy Rose Lee biopic, and another version of the "Take it off the E-string" song that was featured on vol 1).  And then there's the one musical moment from the infamous '60s S&M sound-effects album, "Tortura!"

I also recorded some burlesque film soundtrack music off videos, performed by anonymous sleaze-meisters. This was some years ago when I recorded these, and I can't find most of those films on the YouTubes now.  Too bad, the "Snakes" one in particular was great: a campy guy shouting "Snakes!" and running off camera, followed by a girl dancing with an actual, live enormous boa constrictor-type beastie. Towards the end, she even starts to put the snakes' head unto her mouth. A search for "snakes + burlesque" didn't come up with anything, but if any of you-all know this one, send us the links, pleeze!

And for some great reading whilst listening to this music, check out our pals at  
Decadent History for a plethora of fascinating articles. Learn your history, kids! 

Lowbrow Vol.3 Hubba Hubba! - A MusicForManiacs Collection

01 "Burlesque Uncensored" - lobby talker-chorus line-strip tease
02 Natalie Wood-Let Me Entertain You [from "Gypsy," 1962]
03 "Angels Wild Women"
04 Perez Prado - Exotic Suite of the Americans (excerpt)
05 Kay Kyser His Orchestra - Strip Polka [The Andrews Sisters also recorded this popular '40s Big Band number]
06 Dick Dale & His Del-Tones - Take It Off
07 "Varietease" - Betty Page, Bobby Shields [video soundtrack]
08 "The Naughty Stewardesses"
09 Dick Contino & Eddie Layton - Blues in the Night [accordionist Contino isn't just a James Ellroy character; in fact, he's real, alive, and still performs] 
10 Barbara Stanwyck - The G-String Song [from the 1943 film "Lady of Burlesque", recorded off video]
11 Big Jay McNeely - Striptease Swing [sax wildman, veteran of LA's legendary Central Ave scene, is also still alive and blowin']
12 Eddie Wayne [actually surf/session guitarist Jerry Cole] - Dig Ye Deep
13 Jayne Mansfield - Suey [the great blond bombshell is backed here by a pre-fame Jimi Hendrix!]
14 Ricky Vale & The Surfers - Ghost Surfin'
15 "Nurses for Sale"
16 John Barry - The Stripper [nope, not the David Rose hit (see below); yep, the James Bond soundtrack guy]
17 Ernie Freeman - The Stripper [Freeman's the man who brought Sinatra into the r'n'b scene with "That's Life"]
18 "Porno Photos"
19 "Tortura" - untitled (Track 21)
20 "Snakes"
21 Snakes! [burlesque film soundtrack]
22 The Knight Beats - Going To Town
23 Hal Blaine & The Young Cougars - Gear Stripper [Blaine is possibly the most recorded drummer in history; he's certainly one of the few to record a drag-race/burlesque fusion song]
24 The Bangers - Baby Let Me Bang Your Box, Part 1 [this r'n'b shouter is, of course, referring to the lady's piano]
25 John Buzon Trio - Ill Wind
26 Voodoo Virgin - [burlesque film soundtrack]
27 Stan Kenton - Blues In Burlesque [No, that's not Tom Waits singing, it's drummer Shelly Mann, with Maynard Ferguson blowin', from 1951]

All tracks safe for work! We like wholesome sleaze around here.

COVER THE EARTH Vol. 5

When will it end?!  Still more bizarre international ethnic versions of Western pop hits. And by 'ethnic' I also mean American and European styles like bluegrass (# 6) and polka. Also: several Trinidad steel drum tracks (# 1, 9, and 18); the Moog hit "Popcorn" played as a South American chicha; Guns'n'Roses go cumbia; The Buggles go Bollywood; a jazz classic performed on sitars and tablas. And wasn't Bob Marley a lot more fun in the '60s, when he was covering the Archies?

COVER THE EARTH Vol. 5

1. Amral's Trinidad Cavaliers - The World is A Ghetto
2. Arsenio Rodriguez & the Afro Cuban Sound - Hang on Sloopy
3. Bappi Lahiri - Auva Auva ("Video Killed The Radio Star"/India)
4. Bob Marley - Sugar Sugar
5. Brave Combo - Double Vision cha cha
6. Bruce Hornsby-Ricky Skaggs - Superfreak
7. Cachicamo con Caspa y Leiko el perro de la IIIII dimension -Sweet Child o' Mine (Venezuela)
8. Chang Loo - Jambalaya (Hank Williams/China)
9. Esso Steelband - I Want You Back 
10. Jimmy Sturr - Splish Splash polka
11. Kiyohiko Senba and his Haniwa All Stars - Kono Mune no Tokimeki o  ("You Don't Have To Say You Love Me")
12. Lelu Thaert - Dance Soul (Booker T & The MGs "Hip Hug Her"/Cambodia)
13. Lennie Hibbert - Nature Boy ("It Was A Very Good Year"/Jamaica)
14. Los Tropicanos - My Sweet Lord (Brasil)
15. Petty Booka - Girls Just Want to Have Fun (Japan/Ja-waiin)
16. Chicha Libre - Popcorn Andino (Gershon Kingsley's "Popcorn"/Peru-USA)
17. Sachal Studios Orchestra - Take Five (Dave Brubeck/Pakistan)
18. Sapodilla Punch - Hold on I'm Coming
19. The Polka Floyd Show - Another Brick in the Wall

In case you missed 'em:
Vol. 1
Vol. 2
Vol. 3
Vol. 4

ADIOS A LOS BEATLES

There is no more glorious sound for jaded ears than this rural Mexican brass band blowing berserk, off-key, highly enthusiastic instrumental versions of Beatles songs. Even the dreaded "Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da" sounds great as a crazy carnival theme. Sadly, nothing is known about the band responsible for this genuine piece of folk-art madness other than that they were from, as their name would indicate, Tepetlixpa.  

The lack of info almost makes me wonder if this isn't a hoax. Consider the name Banda Plástica De Tepetlixpa Mex.: a reference to Plastic Ono Band? And the back cover tells a preposterous story of Lennon and McCartney visiting Tepetlixpa. But there is still plenty of information that has not been captured in the internet's nets, and these guys could very well have simply never been documented in their time. Tepetlixpa, after all, is a pretty obscure little village, warranting only a few sentences on their skimpy wiki page...if they really were from Tepetlixpa. I've heard no indications that this is a hoax, but even if it is, it's still as enjoyable as The Portsmouth Sinfonia, or Fritz Guckenheimer and his Sour Kraut Band.

We're Banda Plástica De Tepetlixpa Mex.
We hope you will enjoy the show:  

"ADIOS A LOS BEATLES"

01 Ob-La-Di, Ob La Da

02 I Want To Hold Your Hand

03 Carry That Weight

04 Yesterday 

05 Eleanor Rigby

06 Yellow Submarine

07 Hey Jude

08 Girl

09 I Should Have Known Better

10 A Hard Days Night

The Gospel Accordion To Frank

And lo! the Lord appeared to Father Frank Perkovich, saying unto him: go amongst the Catholics of the American Midwest, and playeth polka music, so that they might gather in My name on the Sabbath. And Frank of Minnesota took up his accordion and in 2008 releasedeth the album "Songs And Hymns From The Polka Mass" with Joe Cvek and his band. And the blogger did LOL out loud upon listeningeth to it, for he is a damnable heathen. Clicketh on the song title below, so that you might do the Chicken Dance for Jesus:

Father Frank Perkovich: "Chapel in the Valley"

Yes, this is real. Polka masses have apparently been celebrated for years, primarily in the Midwest, tho not without some controversy. Some feel that a secular dance music is not appropriate for a Sunday service.  And some - the REAL heathens! - just don't like polka. 

AN ALBUM CALLED "DISCO POLKA" THAT HAS DISCO VERSIONS OF POLKA SONGS AND POLKA VERSIONS OF DISCO SONGS AND...

...so help me, I did it. *hangs head in shame*  I recorded the entire Myron Floren "Disco Polka" album, and *chokes* am releasing it from my laboratory onto an unsuspecting public.  Have mercy on my damned soul!

Myron Florens' "Disco Polka" album of disco versions of polka songs and polka versions of disco songs and disco versions of easy-listening songs and some songs have Moogs

Bandcamp Is The New Cassette Culture...

...tho compared to the '80s/'90s tape underground:
- the sound quality of indie music sites like Bandcamp is usually a lot better than those hissy tapes
- even if you don't buy you can listen for free
- you don't have to go to the bother of sending away for items via the mail: they're right here! Go get 'em! 
So consider this post the equivalent of when magazines like 'Option' used to have tape reviews.

- Convivial Cannibal "Buy The People Afford The People": An album as good as the band name; Absolutely fascinating unclassifiable L.A.-area weirdness that conjures up an air of dark esoterica by mixing live instruments with what sound like old ethnic music samples, children's music boxes played backwards, and unidentified sounds; the audio equivalent of a Joseph Cornell shadow box. Sometimes it resembles traditional music when it's just singing and guitar, but they're both buried under effects to the point of illegibility. "Avant garble" they call it. Numerous other-worldy videos and the new "Iniquitous Ubiquitous" album (check the hypnotically droning "There Are Greys Outside Your Window") are likewise recommended. Price: name your price.

- Dr. D.R. Barclay "One Note Mixtape": I don't believe this. Some mad genius has taken every one-note guitar solo he could find from the rock era and mixed them together into two 7-minute mixes. Some I recognized (Neil Young, The Ramones) and plenty I didn't. Hilarious and utterly mental.  Price: $3.

- "Roncheras" v/a: Traditional Mexican styles like the polka-esque ranchera and the melodramatic mariachi get cooked into a delicious burrito of electro, rock, experimental, even 8-bit post-modernism for a furious fiesta.  Highlites include Dr. Almeja's rockin' 'Ek Chuac,' and Dada Ket's cartoonishly crazy 'LA Costenida.'  Muy fun. Price: free.

-The Hathaway Family Plot "Worry": a horrible year of illness and family deaths inspired this brief but powerful electro/noise suite. Individual tracks like "I Should Be" work well on their own, but the album is best experienced as a start-to-finish whole. 

- Jaw Harp Potential "My Boyfriend, Your Cat": Need a little light relief after "Worry"? Try this: three wholesome girls from Iowa who sing five simple, catchy songs on accordion, ukulele, toy piano, glockenspiel, and harp (not a 'blues harp,' an actual harp) that are cute without being overly cutesy. Better then most Beat Happening albums. Really quite wonderful. Price: free.

Oh man, I've got at least 6 more albums I was gonna review...err...think I'll wait until another "issue" of our little 'zine here, this post is getting too long. (Press 'eject.')

WHY YOU SHOULD CARE ABOUT ANNETTE FUNICELLO

You may have heard that The Queen of the Beach, Annette Funicello, recently died at age 70. And, yes, she was a Mouseketeer on "the Mickey Mouse Club" tv series, and starred in the 'beach party' films of the Sixties. But what you gremmies and hodads must dig is that she ticks off a lot of strange-music boxes: exotica; Space Age; novelty music; funny/dumb/clever lyrics; bizarre musical hybrids (e.g.the Cuban/Hawaiian "Surfers' Luau," "Rock-a-Polka,") wild, highly energetic surf/early rock; lounge cheese; explorations of sleazy/kitschy Americana; collaborations with hipster faves like Dick Dale, Fishbone, and the Beach Boys; and songs about circus freaks and mad scientists. And, tho she was most certainly a Big Show-Biz insider, she did everything with the guileless innocence of an outsider - since Annette never intended to be a singer (Walt Disney just pushed her in that direction) she had no agenda, no aspirations, no bitterness about the roles she was offered, and so sang everything with an equal amount of sincerity, whether it was a forlorn love song, or a ridiculous tale about a freak named Jo-Jo The Dog-Faced Boy.

Why haven't punk bands been covering these songs?! She seems to have been overlooked among Crampsian devotees of early mondo-rock collections like "Las Vegas Grind" and  "Wavy Gravy." Maybe because the rap on Annette was that she was another not-too-talented 'teen idol' making bland commercial pap, like Connie Francis, Fabian, and her co-star Frankie Avalon. But even a cursory listen to these songs shoots down that characterization. The berserk energy level and general weirdness of these songs clearly distinguishes her from the likes of, say, Shelly Fabares.

All these songs are from her late '50s-to-mid '60s heyday, except for the last two tracks: her 1985 appearance with Fishbone from the film "Back To The Beach" (I saw it when it came out!) and an early '80s tribute to Annette from LA pop-punk stalwarts Redd Kross. And it was indeed my LA punk youth that first got me into Annette, where she was a kind of den mother figure - never a part of, but beloved by the local surf punks. I still listen to these crazily entertaining songs after all these decades, and I certainly can't say that about everything from my youth. 

A Net Full Of Jello [Thanks to an old Mad Magazine bit for the title]

01 swingin' and surfin'
02 surfin' luau
03 the maid and the martian
04 secret surfin' spot
05 Jo-Jo the Dog-Faced Boy
06 monkey's uncle (with The Beach Boys)
07 California sun
08 draggin' u.s.a.
09 beach party
10 That Crazy Place In Outer Space
11 Merlin Jones
12 Don't Stop Now
13 Rock-a-Polka
14 The Rock-a-Cha
15 Lonely Guitar
16 Tall Paul
17 Pineapple Princess
18 Jamaica Ska (with Fishbone)
BONUS:
Redd Kross - Annette's Got The Hits

AVANT-POLKA

Following on the heels of our last post, which featured The Mighty Accordion Band...

Well, why not avant-polka?  Who says classical, jazz, and rock should have all the fun? Guy Klucevsek's "Polka From The Fringe" is just that, a newly released 2-disk set of originals and commisioned songs written for accordionist Klucevsek, an '80s downtown New York arty-smarty who grew up playing polkas in Pennsylvania coal-mining country. He originally released this album over twenty years ago, and the label promptly went out of business. This new version is greatly expanded, boasting a whopping 29 tracks, many written by prominent avant-garde composers like Tom Cora, Carl Stone, Fred Frith, and Elliot Sharp, whose "Happy Chappie Polka" is downright punk. Despite the heavy art credentials of all involved, it's still alot of fun.  You just can't play a pretentious polka. (Tho it is a lot to absorb - took me a few listens before I finally realized how good this album is.)

Another awesome avant-accordion album comes to us from, of all places, Belarus.  Pictured left, Port Mone's album "DiP" is an excellent collection of moody instrumentals sporting unusual ethnic percussion and some surprisingly funky poppin' bass. I can now say that I have listened to an entire album from Belarus (and so should you.)

Petrojvic Blasting Company (pic below) are a crazy-fun L.A. band featuring a big brass section that suits both European Balkan and New Orleans styles.  Tho probably best experienced live and drunk, their debut album (also available on vinyl) shows off their ace songwriting and muso skillz. They recently toured the old country - Poland, Latvia, Lithuania - but, like the above artists, don't expect anything too authentic.

Norteño literally means "northern", as in the US/Mexican border areas where Mexican musicians mixed their Spanish melodies with Dutch and Geman settlers' polka. A muy bueno norteño album I discovered on the jukebox whilst waiting for my order at a local taquería is Los Dareyes De La Sierra's "Corridazos Con Tuba Y Acordeon." Yep, pretty much the whole album is nothing but accordion and tuba duets.  And the tuba player is loco. Ever bought an album for the tuba?  Now's your chance. Tho I have my reservations about recommending it - I suspect that some of the songs are "narco-corridos," songs about, or even in praise of drug cartel thugs.

Tijuana's Nortec Collective offers a more self-consciously experimental approach to norteño. Like Wu Tang, the Collective quickly split off into solo projects, some leaning more towards techno dance territory, and others, like Bostich and Fussible's 2008 release "Tijuana Sound Machine" still keeping that border-polka beat in there amidst all the space-age sounds.

We then head even furthur down south to Columbia, where the accordion rules the cumbia scene...even as they cover Queen. That's what happens when a British producer (Quantic, in this case) moves to Sud America. From the self-titled album "Los Miticos Del Ritmo."

Ah, what the heck - the link to Duckmandu's accordion cover of the Dead Kennedy's "California Uber Alles" is dead, so I'll throw it in here.

AVANT-POLKA

1. Duckmandu: California Uber Alles
2. Port Mone: River
3. Petrojvic Blasting Company: Princess Andy
4. Port Mone: Youth
5. Guy Klucevsek, Ain't Nothin' But A Polka Band: The VCR Polka (by David Garland)
6. Guy Klucevsek, Ain't Nothin' But A Polka Band: Happy Chappie Polka
7. Guy Klucevsek, Ain't Nothin' But A Polka Band: The Disinformation Polka (Fred Frith)
8. Los Dareyes De La Sierra: La Tragedia Del Compa Man
9. Bostich and Fussible: The Clap
10. Los Miticos Del Ritmo (Feat. Quantic): Otro Muerde El Polvo (Another One Bites The Dust)

The Mighty Accordion Band - They Said It Couldnt Be Done!

Apart from having one of the all-time great album covers (pretty obvious why I snatched this one up for a mere 99 cents at my local charity thrifty emporium), The Mighty Accordion Band 's "They Said It Couldn't Be Done!" is an excellent listen. 20 - count 'em - TWENTY squeeze-boxes playing together creates a unique symphonic sound that ranges from exotica (the Les Baxter soundalike "Jungle Fever") to finger-snappin' jazz, dreamy ballads (great version of "tenderly") and swingin' big band. Pretty much everything but polka. I especially like the bizarre cha-cha version of "Swanee River." Perhaps their taking a corny old tune that no-one was playing anymore and giving it a hip new Latin spin was equivalent to all those New Wave covers of classic rock songs I posted a while back, e.g.: Devo's dismantling of the Stones' "Satisfaction."  Did The Mighty Accordion Band record the first ironic cover?!

Dominic Frontiere is credited as the mad genius behind this project. Hey, I know him! He became a top film soundtrack composer, his "Hang 'Em High" theme being one of the best Spaghetti Western themes.  

The Mighty Accordion Band - They Said It Couldnt Be Done!

The FLYING DUTCHMAN - ONE-MAN BAND SHOW

How's THAT for an album cover? 

I think you can see why I picked up this private-press piece of vintage vinyl recently - it truly is a slice of authentic Americana, a peek into un-hip rural backroads (in this case, Pennsylvania Dutch country) where Ma & Pa go out on a Saturday night to the local tavern and dance to the kind of music left out of the history books, played by the sort of performer usually considered to be not worthy of critical consideration.

Recorded live, Mr. Dutchman is  clearly having a good ol' time, chatting with the crowd,  letting loose with whoops and yee-haws! on occasion. Everything that doesn't sound like a polka (even the Elvis cover) is delivered in a wave-your-mug drinking song waltz-time. And might I direct your attention to the song that features our man playing the accordion and tap-dancing (!) at the same time. They don't make 'em like this any more.  (Or do they?  I suspect that this fellow might be the same guy.)

The FLYING DUTCHMAN - ONE-MAN BAND

Mexican Water Jug/Soda Bottle Folk Instruments

(Vote for "M4M Idol"! You've got 'til Oct. 6.)

A welcome recent trend in Mexican and Mexican/American music is playing instruments made out of recycled garbage. Apart from looking real cool and producing new sounds, it's another example of the resourcefulness of low income people (see also The Congo's Konono No.1, and Staff Benda Bilili.) So far as I know, there haven't been any recordings of this stuff yet, but there are a few YouTube vids featuring the Sparkletts bottle/garden hose (or PVC pipe) "tuba" and plastic 2 liter soda bottle "trumpets." I say "so far as I know" because the comments are all in Spanish and I'm just not bilingual enough to understand it all, e.g.: are there any recordings featuring these instruments? And the last video demonstrates how to make a water jug tuba - can anyone out there translate it for me? I want! Muchas grassy-ass.

First up, the border style known as norteña music. The flatulent sound of this tuba makes me laff!:



Slightly better sound quality on this tune; note the European polka beat, the mark of the norteña (Northern) style, aka Tex-Mex:



South of the border for some Coke bottle mariachi:



Judging by other videos, it seems pretty basic: garden hose or pipe, connects to bottle (e.g.: 12 oz soda bottle), connects to big jug. But - que? - this vid makes it seem more complicated:

VINYL-PALOOZA #4: Hollywood Stomp - Los Angeles in Song 1920s - 1940s

While still sticking to my plan of only posting records this whole month (nothing taken from digital sources) I admit I got things a little wrong - today's post comes from 78s, and they're made out of shellac, not vinyl. Oh, whatever, this is all utterly wonderful music no matter what it's made out of, all from the first half of the history of audio recordings. And all the songs are about Los Angeles, in some way. Interesting that the name "Los Angeles" is almost never used - "Hollywood" and "California" were the magic words, apparently.

There's a real warm, uplifting, and, dare I say, glamorous feel to these tunes, some of which are also very funny and/or a bit odd. Click on the artist name for info on them, if any.

Hollywood Stomp - Los Angeles in Song 1920s - 1940s

Al Jolson - California, Here I Come

Freddie Quintette Simmons - Hollywood Bound (this and Spivey's tune are some low-down bluesy jazz)

Victoria Spivey - Hollywood Stomp

Spike Jones - It Never Rains In Sunny California (Spike's novelties were so imaginative, they were practically avant-garde.)

Felix Figueroa & His Orchestra - Pico and Sepulveda (Yep, the classic that Dr Demento played on his show for years is still the most perfectly strange and fun

ny record one could hope to hear.)

Joe Raymond and His Orchestra - Hollywood

Robert Clarey - Hollywood Bowl (This Frenchman survived the Nazis, and went on to star in "Hogan's Heroes"!)

Russ Morgan - California Orange Blossom

Cleo Brown - When Hollywood Goes Black and Tan

Slim Gaillard - Santa Monica Jump

Kay Kyser - When Veronica Plays the Harmonica ("...on the pier at Santa Monica..." Some of the most ludicrously silly hep-cat lyrics EVER h

ere; oh, and Kyser was the male band leader - the female singer is Gloria Wood)

Earl Burtnett & His Los Angeles Biltmore Hotel Orchestra - If I Had A Talking Picture Of You (The Biltmore Hotel still stands in the heart of Downtown LA, and is quite the ornate, opulant pleasure palace.)

Collins and Harlan - Those Charlie Chaplin Feet

Roy Rogers - San Fernando Valley (this singing cowboy really d

id live in the Valley, not far from where I grew up)

Hoosier Hot Shots - Avalon (These guys were almost as screwy as Spike Jones)

Modernaires - Santa Catalina (Island of Romance) (This vocal group is backed by Glen Miller's big band.)

Deanna Durbin & Robert Paige - Californ-I-Ay (lyrics as nutty as it gets)

(artist unknown) - HollyWood Polka

Dorothy Shay (The "Park Avenue Hillbilly") - I've Been To Hollywood

Benny Goodman Orch. - Hooray For Hollywood (You know the tune, but check out the rather sardonic lyrics HERE.)

FORBIDDEN 45s!! (windbag edition)

Last year, Otis Fodder asked me to put together a guest-dj mix for his late, lamented radio show Friendly Persuasion. I decided to go thru my boxes of (mostly) old 7 inch records and put together a thing called FORBIDDEN 45s!! And since Our Man in Salt Lake City, windbag (who has shared so much awesomeness with us before) sent us a mind-boggling assortment of 7" platters, I'm calling this:

FORBIDDEN 45s!! (windbag edition)

So much here to warm the heart of any Maniac: song-poems, disco atrocities, singing children, singing animals, exercise records, rap novelties, hillbillies, more song poems, angry Chipmunks, Jane Fonda talking dirty, and an enchanted one-man polka puppet-show orchestra.
1. Bobbi Blake - Rock Rock Beat (Ms. Blake was one of the most-recorded singers of the MSR song-poem factory; this "rocker" boasts such money-well-spent lines as "you're nobody's patsy/so hop in a taxi")
2. Luigi's World's Largest One Man Band - Anaconda Polka (major, major discovery here, folks - the only thing I can find about this guy is from this book about the bars of Montana; read that link and be amazed; anyone else got anything on this guy?)
3. Susan Carroll Presents - Waistline and Tummy Exercises (from an ep called "Milady, Your Figure!")
4. Dick Kent - Smiling Farmer-The President (this bewildering ode to Jimmy Carter is one of the best song-poems EVER; to quote Rudy Ray Moore, "I ain't lyin'!")
5. The Hartz Mountain Master Radio Canaries - Pizzicato Polka (real live birdies tweating along with peppy organ and xylophone)
6. Major Bill Smith with Zane and Hogan - Freddy The Disco Frog (minimal-synth disco novelty: Suicide meets Rick Dees?! Oh, and Major Bill Smith was a successful record producer in the early '60s who later claimed that Elvis was alive and he had a recent taped conversation to prove it)
7. Ira Cook - What Is A Girl? (this 1958 side spends more time complaining about little girls than speaking their praises)
8. Klute - Special Exploitation Lobby Record featuring Jane Fonda Dialogue
9. The Hartz Mountain Master Radio Canaries - Humoresque
10. Bill Nettles and His Dixie Blue Boys - God Bless My Darling He's Somewhere (In Viet Nam) (I'm assuming that this craggy-voiced country singer is calling his SON "darling"...uh, right?)
11. Susan Carroll Presents - Thigh and Can-Can Exercise
12. Dick Kent - Cozy Doe (another most-unrockin' rock-n-roll song-poem: "Come on jive, get alive/'cause the clock is at five")
13. Luigi's World's Largest One Man Band - Billings Polka
14. Fred Carson - This Is Not The Time To Cry (This song-poem's author worries about crime, and wants guys to act like real men. Or something like that.)
15. The Hartz Mountain Master Radio Canaries - Mexican Dance
16. The Curbstones - Scrumpdillyishus Land
17. Dick Kent - She Thumbed A Ride
18. The Chipmunks - I Ain't No Dang Cartoon (the b-side to their version of "Achy-Breaky Heart" that was the hidden "bonus" track on a previous windbag comp "Songs of the Sewer;" Alvin sounds rather cranky and defensive here)
19. Ira Cook - What Is A Boy
20. The Hartz Mountain Master Radio Canaries - Beautiful Blue Danube
21. Gene Marshall - Not Owned (Hey, it's Gene Marshall! The guys who sang all those Richard Nixon song-poems! This isn't one of 'em.)
22. Susan Carroll Presents - Duck Walk and Leg Exercise
23. Fat Boys w/Chubby Checker - The Twist (Yo Twist) (This hip-hop novelty actually made it to #16 on the US charts)
24. Zane and Hogan - Studio 54 (This disco instrumental, the b-side to "Freddy The Disco Frog," is a complete spazz-attack.)
25. Bobbi Blake - Who Played House With You? (weird sci-fi keyboard sounds on this song-poem)
26. Bill Nettles and His Dixie Blue Boys - Got A Lot Of Lovin' To Do (this almost-rockbilly toe-tappin' flip of "God Bless My Darling" is impressively energetic considering that he died shortly after recording it.)
27. The Hartz Mountain Master Radio Canaries - An Artists Life
28. Harry Brooks - False Words and False Kisses (another song-poem)

Needless to say, another great big thankyoooo to windy.

THE FINEST YODELING YOU CAN HEAR

Like the "obsolete" instruments I've written about, yodeling is another "uncool" old folk style that, nonetheless, requires a fair amount of technical skill, has a long, rich history, and can be quite ridiculously entertaining. So, once again, let's get uncool.

Arthur Brogli was (is?) a Californian of Alpine origin whose '70s D.I.Y. release "Happy Yodeling" (sorry Goths, no gloomy yodeling here) features, apart from vocals, pretty much only accordion. Which, strangely enough, makes it resemble the "Philip Glass For Accordion" album we recently featured here. A playlist that goes back and forth between these two albums might make for an interesting experience.
Arthur doesn't shoot his wad all at once - you have to wait 3 minutes into the album before you get any yodeling. But that's okay, "Happy Wanderer" is one of my favorite polkas. Then he plays an instrumental. But after that he does get down to some serious yodel action, including a swell version of that much-hated Disney tune, "It's A Small World," thus proving that yodeling makes everything fun.

Arthur Brogli - Happy Yodeling


This has been another fine windbag contribution.

PHILIP GLASS GOES POLKA!

Not really. But an East Coast accordionist has released a collection of Philip Glass covers. Some solo, some of it sounds overdubbed, no other instruments. This shouldn't work in a million years, yet it does, and quite brilliantly at that. It's no gimmick - the guy's got some serious squeezebox skillz, and the surrealism of making 20th classical music sound like a Balkan village dance is an unexpected bonus.

What Capitalism Was - Plays Philip Glass on Accordion
1. Japura River
2. Facades
3. Cloudscape
4. Aria from Act III of Satyagraha
5. Floe
6. Etoile Polaire
7. Subterraneans
8. Resource
9. Knee 1

And you thought that the Dead Kennedys were a strange choice for an accordion tribute...

"I AM GOVERNOR JERRY BROWN..."

So, a topical 30-year-old punk rock song is relevant again. Who'd have thunk it? Of course, Jerry Brown isn't quite the same hippie-fied "Gov. Moonbeam" that he was in the '70s. For one thing, he has a lot less hair now, and he isn't dating Linda Rondstadt (so far as I know). And yes, this portrait of Brown is the official one that hangs in the California state capital. I've seen it! Quite a contrast to the formal, staid governor's portraits that come before and after it.

As we wrote back in '06: "Oakland, CA's Aaron Seeman plays accordian, for your weddings, parties, bar mitvahs, etc. He's in a Romanian folk music group, can play waltzes and polkas. And as Duckmandu he's recorded a note-for-note remake of the entire first Dead Kennedy's album, the punk rock milestone "Fresh Fruit for Rotting Vegetables." Completely solo. Yep, just squeeze-box, and singing that's a darn good impression of DK's vocalist Jello Biafra. From the album "Fresh Duck For Rotting Accordionists":

Duckmandu: "California Über Alles"

or, for you classical music buffs:

Duckmandu: "California Über Alles" (string quartet version)

(What the heck does "Fresh Fruit for Rotting Vegetables" mean, anyway?)
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