'TARD-TRONICA!

Say, friend, do you think electronic dance music is sterile, repetitious, and dull? Is that what's getting you down, friend? Well, if anyone was crazy enough to hire me to spin at an electro night, I'd play no-good, low-down, tasteless lunatics like:

Leslie & The Lys: The reigning queen of 'tard-tronics. You may have chuckled at the video for "Gem Sweater," her ode to Midwestern fashion victims, but her live show blows it away. Leslie is a vision in big hair, blue eye shadow, and gold pants, and video clips between songs are a hilarious peek into Middle American culture - infomercials describing how YOU can attach sequins to your sweater, preachers describing the evils of slam-dancing, and plenty more. And she does her own stunts.

Leslie and the LYs: "Gem Sweater"

mmmmyeah: "Chavfeat": This catchy bit of idiocy regarding a girl with a host of diseases is found on this completely uninformative site. (Thanks to DaDa Hokmayen for the tip!)

Captain Ahab, Los Angeles' contribution to the genre, also have no shortage of tasteless humour - check out their filthy sex rap "I Can't Believe It's Not Booty" on their MySpace page.
But "Girls Gone Wild" is genuinely great. It's actually somewhat sympathetic to those exhibitionistic video girls.

Captain Ahab: "Girls Gone Wild"

DJ Scotch Egg was profiled here before we had even heard his music. His album's now out, and he recently played here in L.A. with Captain Ahab for what was billed as a night of "Retarded Electronics." Mr. Egg is a Japanese fellow whose "instrument" is a tricked-out Gameboy which he plays while screaming obcene rants about how much he hates KFC. Could I make this stuff up?

DJ Scotch Egg: "Scotch Chicken"

You've heard of IDM? I'll take 'TDM.