ANOTHER WEIRD-ASS CHRISTMAS

Our pal Cat A. Waller has assembled another great batch of oddities, novelties, and cheese with a yule-time spin and I'd love to break it down for you, but Cat fears the copyright nazis, and would rather you just download this beast and check it out for yourself. Actually, a lot of it is quite old, so it's probably ok, but hey, can't be too careful nowadays. I can tell you that it's ingredients include: polka, lounge, the voice of Mr Magoo, holiday hillbillies, some helpful radio Public Service Announcements, some vintage burlesque naughtyness, a well-known indie rock band covering a song-poem, and a quite inexplicable number about a prog-rock star in his own winter wonderland. A wildly entertaining assortment that helps to make the season bright.

Cat's other collections, and a great discovery (The Ghostly Trio album) are also available here:

Cat A. Waller's Xmas mixes

Thanks, Cat!

The GTO's "Permanent Damage"

I (and my family) now own the Frank Zappa family cat. Said cat was given to us by the queen of the groupies, Pamela Des Barres. No, I'm not making this up.

Frank Zappa died over 20 years ago, his wife Gail just died last year, and as you may have heard, there has been a much-publicized and unpleasant squabble amongst the four Zappa children. But one thing Ahmet, Moon Unit, Dweezil, and Diva can agree on is: no-one wants Gail's cat.

Enter Miss Pamela. The best-selling author of "I'm With The Band" has known the Zappa  family since Frank's old band the Mothers of Invention ruled the Sunset Strip in the late '60s.  Ms. Des Barres used to babysit the Zappa kids, and Frank produced and played on the one and only album by des Barres' groupie-group, the GTOs, aka Girls Together Outrageously. 

But Pamela couldn't keep the kitty. He did not get along with one of Des Barres' other cats so she put the word out that the Zappa-cat was free to a good home. Instead, he ended up in mine. Kidding! But yeah, my wife learned of this thru the social-media grapevine, and now we own Bongo. Who I hope is not named after the Zappa/Captain Beefheart album "Bongo Fury," because a furious cat who has not been de-clawed suggests another Zappa album title: "Weasels Ripped My Flesh."

But he seems fine, so let's celebrate the arrival of the newest member of the family with this true cult classic of an album. Des Barres and her fellow scenesters were most certainly not trained singers, but I wouldn't have it any other way - their daffy enthusiasm is a beautiful thing to behold. And in any case, they receive sympathetic assistance from not only The Mothers, but Davy Jones of the Monkees, Jeff Beck, and an out-of-place Rod Stewart. Tho just about anyone normal and mainstream would sound out-of-place on this unselfconsciously kooky mixture of gossipy, sometimes lurid spoken word (subjects include: Beefheart's choice of foot-wear, and foxy 11-year-old boys who resemble Brian Jones), guest appearances (a kinda creepy Rodney Bingeheimer), and surprisingly catchy eccentric pop songs. Day-glo earworms!

The GTO's "Permanent Damage" (1969; liner notes from the album:)
1.

	"The Eureka Springs Garbage Lady" (lead vocal: Miss Christine)	3:47
2.	"Miss Pamela and Miss Sparky discuss STUFFED BRAS and some of their early gym class experiences"	2:10
3.	"Who's Jim Sox?" (Spoken: A B.T.O. is the opposite of a G.T.O. only they get in there more - sexually, than we do. It means, Boys Together Often, Only, Occasionally, Organically, Outrageously. All those O’s.)	0:18
4.	"Kansas and the BTO's"	1:12
5.	"The Captain's Fat Theresa Shoes" (This is a song about a pair of crazed shoes CAPTAIN BEEFHEART wears.)	1:56
6.	"Wouldn't it be Sad if There Were No Cones?" (Miss Pamela & Sparky discuss the manner in which local Hollywood soul brothers make sexual advances in front of the Whisky a Go Go.)	1:11
7.	"Do Me in Once and I'll Be Sad, Do Me in Twice and I'll Know Better (Circular Circulation)" (This is a reasonably abstruse love song with a gentle bum in it.)	2:19
8.	"The Moche Monster Review" (Miss Pamela gives us an insight into the behavior of “the other breed” who drive “soft cars”… the sexual advances they make toward girls while they’re hitchhiking.)	1:46
9.	"TV Lives" (A brief word about television. This song is nearly as absurd as the medium it describes.)	1:03
10.	"Rodney" (Rodney Bingenheimer is one of the more unique figures of contemporary social history. The G.T.O.s have put together an unusual piece which includes the voice of Mr. Bingenheimer as he comments on the lyrics which have been written about his peculiar exploits. This “song” might give you a broad view of the scene in Hollywood as it relates to the Sunset Strip’s foremost male groupie.)	3:42
11.	"I Have a Paintbrush in My Hand to Color a Triangle (Mercy’s Tune)" (This is a song about a lovers’ triangle which involves Brian Jones, Bernardo B.T.O. and Mercy.)	2:11
12.	"Miss Christine's First Conversation With the Plaster Casters of Chicago" (In this episode we find our exotic Yugoslavian maiden explaining her moral viewpoint after reading a short segment of Cynthia Plaster Caster’s diary.)	0:57
13.	"The Original GTO's" (Miss Lucy and Miss Johna were the originators of G.T.O.ism two years ago. In this sequence we find them inside a piano kissing each other & having a cosmic-level discussion.)	1:05
14.	"The Ghost Chained to the Past, Present, and Future (Shock Treatment)" (Miss Mercy explains her personal philosophy. Lead vocals: Mercy and R.S. (Rod Stewart).)	1:45
15.	"Love on an Eleven Year Old Level" (For some reason, the G.T.O.’s are preoccupied by the memory of Brian Jones. In this song they discuss their mutual admiration for an 11 year old boy who happens to look like Brian… and also has a couple of other things going for him.)	1:18
16.	"Miss Pamela's First Conversation With the Plaster Casters of Chicago" (Cynthia and Miss Pamela find that they have a “fave rave” in common, and proceed to compare notes on their relationship with him. Some semantic difficulties toward the end of the conversation provide a convenient transition to the next piece of material.)	1:31
17.	"I'm in Love with the Ooo-Ooo Man" (In real life, the OOO OOO Man is Nick St. Nicholas from Steppenwolf. Miss Pamela sings the lead vocal on this very special song of love. I have no idea what the rubber chicken suit with the beak is.)	3:27

Notes

The G.T.O.’s write all their own lyrics & no subject matter covered by these lyrics was suggested by any outside source. The choice of subjects is a reflection of the girls’ own attitudes toward their environment. The G.T.O.’s hope you like their album. — Frank Zappa

I CUT PEOPLE: "I Quit"

27 tracks of lightning-fast audio edits whizzing by in 24 minutes? It can only mean another release from I Cut People and their ever-improving m.o. of wicked social satire thru a dense collage of countless samples. The album is called "I Quit" but let's hope he isn't. With Negativland members dropping dead left and right, and The Tape Beatles seemingly out of action, ICP would appear to be our best chance for reversing the usual one-way stream of corporate/religious info-tainment, creatively recycling this waste, and spitting it back. The inanity of the mass media, politics and consumerism, and the anxiety it produces in the brainwashed populace has never been more funny! And entertaining! NOW how much would you pay?! 

I Cut People "I Quit"

Picks to click: "Try It," "All You Need Is More Things," and "All About Crap." And if Beavis and Butthead were sound collagists, they would have proudly produced "Dick Bible."

HIPPIE NOISE IN A LAUNDROMAT

The self-titled 1971 album "The Roots Of Madness" is a truly historic avant/outsider artifact. Incredibly, the recordings of this, well, madness date back as far as 1969. That beats The Residents, and the LA Free Music Society were a couple years away from forming. And needless to say, The Great Punk DIY Explosion was far off on the horizon when this bag of nutters from the wholly unremarkable Northern California town of San Jose made this home-brew concoction. 

Ingredients: tinkly music boxes, short wave radios, free-jazz, blues guitar, beat poetry, smutty poetry, a Dada sensibility, a smart-ass sense of humor, sound effects, even an actual song or two. All common strategies now, but must have been fairly incomprehensible at the time. And yes, they did do gigs in laundromats. It's not like there were too many actual music venues in town to play.

Free listen/download:

"The Roots Of Madness"

One of the members, Don Campau, went on to a still-extant experimental music and public radio career.

CASSIUS CLAY: "I Am The Greatest"

When great men die, of course, we should remember them by their weird novelty records.

To note the passing of the former Cassius Clay, Muhammad Ali, let's listen to The Lip From Louisville's early '60s album of his clever, funny poems, delivered with gusto. Damn near proto-rapping, I'd say. Some lame comedy sketches that he most certainly did not (entirely) write are in there too, but look on the bright side: bonus tracks that set his poems to groovy music. And then there's his singing... a karaoke-esque cover of "Stand By Me," and a ridiculous sing-along called "The Gang's All Here."

CASSIUS CLAY: "I Am The Greatest"

And don't forget his all-star kids albums:
  
"Ali and His Gang Vs. Mr. Tooth Decay" - From 1976, with Frank Sinatra! And Howard Cosell.

"The Dope King's Last Stand" - From 1977, with an even more all-starry cast. How's this for a line-up: President Jimmy Carter, Lily Tomlin, Pat Boone, Senator Hubert Humphrey, Billie Jean King, and Sinatra again.

As a Los Angeles native, I'm used to seeing celebrities here, as well as in Las Vegas, and New York. If you've spent much time in those cities you know that it's not a big deal, maybe someone will recognize a celeb, chat briefly, then leave them alone. But when I saw Ali strolling thru Caesar's Palace in Vegas, there was a veritable mob surrounding him. A peaceful, respectful mob, but still, I have never seen one individual create such a commotion. I think I saw the Pope, the President, and the cast of "Friends" waving and saying, "Hey, over here! What about us?!"

BINGO GAZINGO

Whilst perusing the roughly 5,372 albums R. Stevie Moore has put up on his Bandcamp page, I was delighted to see that the Bingo Gazingo album is now available for your free listening/low-cost purchasing pleasure. Mr. Gazingo was a real character, a senior citizen who started appearing at poetry readings in the 1990s, hilariously declaiming in a New Yawk voice his short, rhymed phrases, often only vaguely related to what his poems where supposed to be about. This, his one and only album, features a back-up band featuring Moore, Chris Butler (of The Waitresses, and Tin Huey), and various djs from WFMU, the station that would release this album. The music is a real variety show, from punk, to soulful r'n'b, to abstract improvs. But of course the late Bingo is the star of the show, proclaiming such profound utterances as:

- They're playing classic rock/in Jurassic Park

- I want to make my home in/your ovum

- Rick the wanker/from Casablanca/I sing like Paul Anka

- My projectile/is erectile

- I cannot accept/your indecent proposal/maybe a horse'll

I'm glad no-one told him that Tupac's last name isn't pronounced "shaker" - it would have messed up his rhymes.

BINGO GAZINGO

Speaking of R. Stevie Moore, out of his near-infinite discography, I've heard maybe...3 albums? I def. like "Phonography," esp. the wonderful "Goodbye Piano," where he bumps his head into the mic, and keeps on singing. And I have a couple greatest "hits" collections. But NOW where do I go?

Lowbrow Vol.7: Devil Dance

Reposts! By request: Pierre Bastien's marvelous mechanical musics and Snoopy's Beatles Classics on Toys. I won't be re-upping any Twink The Toy Piano Band, as he has put all of his stuff on Bandcamp, so go there.

Due to a crashed hard drive, this volume was delayed and Vol. 8 was posted first, but now our series exploring mid-20th-century kool kulture is sequentially correct. In this volume, former nightclub accordionist-turned-killjoy preacher Jack van Impe warns us of the dangers of that devils' music, thusly illustrated by riotous, ridiculous, rhythm-and-blues, rock'n'roll rekkids (ever notice that Satan is often depicted as smiling and laughing? He's apparently having much more fun than The Other Guy). Lots of ludicrous novelties this time out, by artists gleefully unconcerned with making Profound Artistic Statements. You'll have fun fun fun even after - and I want to make this perfectly clear - even after Daddy takes the T-bird away. 

But this time, let's add "style" to our usual mix of "sin," "sex" and "sleaze". Publisher V. Vale of the legendary RE/Search books has been bemoaning the state of his home city lately, e.g: "We think it’s necessary to read as much humor as possible these days to keep our morale up, as San Francisco daily becomes more inundated with a tsunami of “techies” proud of their acultural normcore barbarism (trendy new martinis, trendy new restaurants—is that all there is?!) 

 I wasn't familiar with the term "normcore," but it's apparently a fashion statement popular among urban youth that attempts to create as bland and inconspicuous a look as possible (while still prominently wearing designer labels, of course). Baseball caps, pullovers, etc. Artist-types shunning original style to look like their dad. My God-zilla! and you thought modern culture couldn't get any more boring? Perhaps that's why in recent months I've been hittin' the thrift stores looking for real flash suits and bright-colored Hawaiian-style shirts, creating outfits like the one Don Draper is sporting here. (Shirt collars OVER the jacket, doncha know.) And paisley shirts! They might go well with my Peter Fonda "Easy Rider" sunglasses. Gotta buy a new pair of Beatle boots tho, as the ones I had when I was 20 are sadly long gone. And where can I get a medallion to adorn my chest as I wear my v-neck, wide-collar David Cassidy-type paisley shirt? It's kinda like this one, only blue. There must be someplace where one can get those loud shirts Nelson Mandela used to wear. If any shirts are worth $95, these may be them. Fashion tips in comments, please. And photo links, esp. from ladies sporting leopard skin prints.

Loud clothes - clothes that go up to 11 - need loud music. So once again, we're pouring in your earholes lots of stuff taken from my mostly 45 rpm vinyl discoveries that have not only not appeared on other like-minded compilations (so far as I know), but have never been digitally available...until now! Can find no info on some of these mysterious sides. 

Dig the AbnormCore sounds here:

Lowbrow Vol.7: Devil Dance - almost 69 minutes; (69: the dirtiest number in the world!)

1 Jack van Impe - rock music is more dangerous ("From Night Clubs to Christ") 
2 Mad Man Taylor - Rumble Tumble
 3 Bruce Johnston - Soupy Shuffle Stomp [future "replacement" for Brian Wilson with a 
retarded tribute to TV funnyman Soupy Sales]
4 Bobby Peterson Quintet - Mama Get Your Hammer [sick humor + screamin' r'n'b = what all
 music should be like]
5 Jack van Impe - rock and roll music
6 Thee Midnighters - Everybody Needs Somebody To Love
7 Spike Jones - Pimples And Braces [yes, The Master novelty bandleader did live long 
enough to parody teenagers and rock'n'roll]
8 Grace Chang - I Want You To Be My Baby [famous singing actress of Chinese cinema 
swings bilingual]
9 Jack van Impe - commie plans
10 The Lancasters - Satan's Holiday
11 Georgia Gibbs - Kiss of Fire (rock version) [this was originally an early '50s tango-type
 hit for Gibbs, but this 45 is apparently a '60s remake, judging by the swiping of Roy Orbison's
"Oh Pretty Woman" riff]
12 Jack van Impe - commie rock beat
13 Morty Jay and the Coney Island Brass - Beef-Eater [one of my absolute fave (fairly) recent instro 45 rpm discoveries]
14 Vince Edwards - Squealin Parrot (Twist) [was very surprised to come across a 45 with such a 
wacky title by teen dream actor Edwards, as most of his records are mushy ballads; was even 
more surprised to find how wacked-out hilarious it was]
15 ''Handsome'' Jim Balcom - Corrido Rock (Part 1)
16 Jack van Impe - vile filthy dirty
17 Mike Minor - Satan's Waiting [from an alternate universe where Satanists favor 
finger-snappin' lounge over heavy metal]
18 Scott Engel - Devil Surfer [future avant-crooner Scott Walker once recorded a satanic 
surf instro, under his original name?!]
19 Jack van Impe - gogo pogo
20 The Allisons - Ling Ting Tong [black girl group singing Asian stereotypes, and a way-out (slide?) guitar solo]
21 Bill Lewis - Swim Beat
22 Jack van Impe - naked!
23 The Motions - Long-Hair
24 Rod McKuen - I Dig Her Wig [one would never guess that the man behind this kooky
 rocker would go on to become a hugely successful author of sappy poetry]
25 Bobby Gregg And His Friends - The Jam Part 1
26 Jack van Impe - 4 letter word
27 Lou Monte - Elvis Presley For President [Monte was the court jester of the Rat Pack
 /Italian-Amercan scene]
28 The Sparkletones - I Dig You,Baby [I'd rather not describe here what makes the 
end part of this song, and the entirety of the next song, so, er, 'unique'; you'll hear]
29 Gene Dozier & The Brotherhood - Mustang Sally
30 Bill Haley & His Comets - Straight Jacket (Live)
31 Jack van Impe - baser animal emotions
32 David Houston - One And Only [from the film 'Carnival Rock' (thanks Youtube!);
 featuring blistering guitar work by Elvis' string-slinger James Burton]
33 Steve Allen - Memphis [tv comic plays a straight-ahead ahead Chuck Berry
 instro...but I thought he hated rock n roll?]
34 Steven Garrick and his Party Twisters - Sister's a Twister 
35 The Applejacks - Rocka-Conga
36 Jack van Impe - twisted vile perverted
37 Royaltones - Wail
38 Jack Gale & The Medicine Men - The Sloppy Madison [radio dj's parody of  
incomprehensible dance instruction records]
39 Milt Rogers & His Orchestra - Lonely Road To Damascus

Album title and artwork courtesy of burlesque queen Gene Gemay. 

Evangelist Jimmy Swaggart "The Ring Of Fire: A Message To The Youth of America"

You boys and girls that have Beatle records at home...This is the most rotten, dirty, damnable, filthy, putrid FILTH that this nation of the world has ever known. And you parents that would allow this filth to be in your home, you ought to be taken out somewhere and horse-whipped, you hear me?
-- Jimmy Swaggart, "The Ring of Fire", 1968"

When reader Kenny left that comment, referring to the sin-tillating collection "The Big Rumble", I said: well sweet jumpin' Jeebus on a pogo-stick, I have got to have that album, pronto! And long-time M4M contributor Windbag came thru. But no-one's a bigger windbag then disgraced whorin' porn-addict Jimmy Swaggart, who somehow makes his cousin Jerry Lee Lewis look respectable, with his message to "the Youth of America." Presumably then, you European, Asian, African and Latin kids can have all the fun you want. Damn you!

In a most enjoyably hyperventilating manner, Swaggart huffs and puffs against the immoralities of our age. Not too surprising, given the above quote, but he even suggests that the appropriate response to children disobeying their parents is the death penalty. Hey, that's what the bible says! If you're thinking of sampling this album, Meat Beat Manifesto (meat)beat you to it 20 years ago, but don't let that stop you. There's still plenty of nuggets waiting to be mined by the right DJs/sound collagists. I really did LOL out loud when he went off on Mom putting on her miniskirt and going out to dance The Frug! The Monkey! The Watusi! Despite the title, he does not sing any Johnny Cash songs, however.

After 6 discs celebrating Sin City, I think we really need to attempt to cleanse our damned souls now:  
 
Jimmy Swaggart "The Ring Of Fire"

Bothers and sisters, let us give thanks and praise to the Most High Windy!

 

LAS VEGAS DAMMIT! Six Disks That Sing of Sin

I don't have to say much about this stupendous, endlessly entertaining collection of audio celebrating Sin City because it's compiler Don-O, the cat who previously slipped us the "Xanadu" tribute comps, has spilled plenty of virtual ink his own self. Take it away, Don-O: 

The Las Vegas story (for track listings, liner notes, artwork, etc)

Take heed! Apart from the nonstop cavalcade of music from all eras and genres, and the comedy/spoken word tracks, there are numerous vintage radio and tv spots recorded off the Vegas airwaves years ago by Don-O himself. Bravo, sir, and thanks for preserving true Vegas, before djs spinning top 40 replaced the tuxedo-clad lounge entertainers, before dining and shopping surpassed gambling as Vegas' top earner (making what is now essentially Rodeo Drive East a helluva lot more expensive), before the ruthless, criminal, but fun-loving mob were replaced by giant soulless corporations, before...

LAS VEGAS DAMMIT! vol1
LAS VEGAS DAMMIT! vol2
LAS VEGAS DAMMIT! vol3
LAS VEGAS DAMMIT! vol4
LAS VEGAS DAMMIT! vol5
LAS VEGAS DAMMIT! vol6

THE BIG RUMBLE! Uncensored Scenes of the Nightmares of a Weirdo

(Back up, by request: Roky Erickson live, Jonathan Brandmeier, Bah Humbug, and CURL ACTIVATE 2: More '80s Hip-Hop Novelties.)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Never before in the history of blogging has there been such a SHOCKING collection of '50s/'60s audio atrocities! You'll flip your wig (or your switchblade) when you...HEAR riotous rock'n'roll and rancid radio ads! HEAR bad-boy bikers blowin' rhythm-and-blues! HEAR their rockabilly "rumble" with rival gangs! These heathen hot-rodding hoodlums and harlots are on a one-way drag race to HELL!

Music For Maniacs, the blog that brought you such SIN-tillating compilations as "Voodoo Dance Doll," and the banned-in-Boston "Hubba Hubba!," are back with an all-new spine-tingling collection of virgin vinyl rips and recorded-off-YouTube sound selections, many of which have never been digitally available before! There are other similar collections of this sort of teen trash, but these songs have (so far as I know) not been previously compiled.

Starring in this festival of forgotten (forbidden?!) 45s: a teen-aged (and unrecognizable) Scott Walker, still going by the name Scott Engel; gay novelty act Sandy Beech; one Mike Minor, possible the only lounge crooner to tackle juvenile delinquency; a Frank Zappa production; both a song by the Cheers (featuring future game show host Bert Convy) and a cover of the Cheers' hit "Black Denim Trousers" (that I think I prefer to the original); Harold Lloyd Jr - yes, the son of the hanging-off-the-clock guy - who had a short, strange life; and since every psychobilly/Cramps-related comp features Link Wray's "Rumble," we're including a different Wray rumbler that might be an even better tune.

Volume 7 of our ongoing survey of mid-century sleazy-listening sounds is in limbo - on a hard-drive that has apparently crashed. A drive I bought to be a backup for my main drive!  Damn thing (a Passport) is less then a year old. Hoping it can be recovered. So we're jumping to Vol. 8.

As Oliver Reed sings:
"Black Leather, Black Leather, Smash Smash Smash!
Black Leather, Black Leather, crash crash crash!
Black Leather, Black Leather, Kill Kill Kill!"

"LOWBROW Vol. 8: The Big Rumble"

1 ad - "The Thrill Killers"
2 Link Wray - Rumble Rock
3 Jeff Daniels - Switchblade Sam [one of the more surreal, hysterical rockabilly boppers I've ever heard, describing some kind of orgy between Long Tall Sally, Stagger Lee, and, er, Charlie Brown?]
4 Oliver Reed - Black Leather Rock [from the film "(These Are) The Damned"]
5 The Shadows - The Rumble
6 ad - "High School Hellcats"/"Hot Rod Gang"
7 The Cheers - Chicken [presumably inspired by the "chickie run" scene in the James Dean film "Rebel Without a Cause"]
8 The Champs - Experiment In Terror [like Link Wray, those "Tequila" boys The Champs did in fact record more than one song]
9 The Diamonds - Daddy Cool
10 ad - "The Wild Rebels"
11 Bill Woods - Go Crazy Man
12 Alexander (Sandy) Courage - Hot Rod Rumble (Main Title)
13 Bob Peck - Sweet 16 [cool song Bob, but you're still the poor man's Tom Lehrer!]
14 Ray Smith - Rockin' Bandit
15 The Orange Groove - Street King [it's a shame we'll never know what geniuses made this brilliant quasi-Middle Eastern bad-boy oddity for a budget label]
16 Don Lonie Talks With Teenagers (excerpt)
17 Scott Walker (aka Scott Engel) - Good For Nothin' [Wow, before I came across this 45, I had no idea about the pre-Walker Brothers rockabilly past of Scott W.]
18 Homer Denison Jr - Chickie Run [hello, sound fx!]
19 Steve Karmen - 'Teenage Gang Debs' theme
20 ad - "Fiend For Flesh!"/"Road Rebels" [alas, these films, scarcely released in the first place, are considered lost]
21 Hal Blaine & the Young Cougars - Green Monster
22 Hells Angels (dialogue)
23 The Diamonds - Black Denim Trousers and Motorcycle Boots
24 The Rotations - The Cruncher [not "The Crusher"! but an early Zappa production]
25 Die Crazy Girls - Der Feuerstuhl (Leader Of The Pack) [is she saying "buzz off, buzz off" in this German Shangri-las remake?]
26 ad - "She Devils on Wheels"
27 Epitones - The Mighty Rumble
28 Sandy Beech - Leather Jacket Lovers [amazing that this outrageous s&m parody was released back in the '60s; how did they get away with it!? Er, well, maybe J. Edgar Hoover dug it, he was a pretty kinky cat...]
29 Harold Lloyd Jr w/Page Cavanaugh - Daddy Bird [from the terrible film "Frankenstein's Daughter"]
30 Mike Minor - Rumble In The Night
31 Hash Brown - The Rumble
32 ad - "Bury Me an Angel"
33 The Crickets - I Fought The Law [yep, 'twas a post-Buddy Holly Crickets that wrote and first recorded this classic; why was it not the hit that Bobby Fuller's version was? Perhaps  the reference to a "zip-gun", the homemade rubber-band-powered gun that punk kids used, was too controversial; changing it to "six gun" removed it to a safer Old Western past]
34 Vicki Young - Riot In Cell Block #9 [the Leiber and Stoller hit for The Coasters (dba The Robins) gets a female makeover]
35 Barry Green (aka Barry Blue) - Shake A Tail Suzie [a Suzuki 'cycles promo]

HI-FI SCI-FI: Vintage Monster/Space/Horror/Futurism Audio Oddities

Now up for your downloading pleasure, six (and counting) volumes of monstrous mix-tapes, perfect for these Halloween-y times we're living in. And what might their contents be? Compiler Cat A. Waller sez: "I'm afraid to say what's on them. Might get googled and busted. I'm kinda wimpy like that." Well, after checking out three volumes (so far) I can heartily recommend this witch's brew of vintage horror rock, more recent New Wave and novelty artists, and relevant sound (vampire?) bites and film dialogue, amongst other surprises.

Monstro Monster Mixes 

Still not enough for ya? "Hi-Fi Sci-Fi," the latest installment in our continuing exploration of mid-century arty-facts from the Golden Age of Cool, deals with every aspect of the fantastic: Outer Space! Monsters! Monsters from space! Not only is much of this stuff ripped from vinyl and, so far as I know, has not been compiled on other collections of vintage sleazy-listening sounds, but there's also a number of tracks recorded off of video: movie songs (and dialogue, sound fx, etc.) that were not released on record, but should have been. There will be more such movie musics in future volumes. So keep watching the skies!

Apart from the unknown garage rockers and novelty acts releasing 45s on regional labels, we also have a few big stars: Diana Ross & The Supremes, Bo Diddley, Louis Prima...and crooners. Crooners already rule, but when they sing straight-faced, sincere, utterly inappropriate 'love themes' to cheesy b-movies, they just get, er, 'rule-ier.' Bobby Rydell's finger-snappin' vocal version of "Telstar" must be heard to be believed. See also: "Journey to the Seventh Planet" on "Vol. 5".

Lowbrow Vol. 6: HI-FI SCI-FI 

01 The Crescendos - Countdown
02 Louis Prima - Fly Me To The Moon [from a private-press release by this king of Vegas lounge singers]
03 Gemini & The Planets - Copa City Promo, Miami, FL ["gyrating go-go girls dancing on a bed of nails"?!]
04 The Supremes - Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine [wouldn't it be nice to hear the oldies station play this theme song to a nutty Vincent Price film instead of "Baby Love" for the umpteenth time?]
05 Monty Johnson - Flying Saucers in the Air
06 The Sci-Fis - Science Friction
07 Ralph Young - Moon Doll [future half of very successful duo Sandler & Young croons the theme to "Nude On The Moon," a film about nudes on the moon.]
08 "Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster": Bob Crewe - Scramble All Jets
09 Big Maybelle - Egg Plant That Ate Chicago [rhythm and blues legend Maybelle recorded the original "Whole Lotta Shakin Goin On"; which is all well and good, but I prefer this]
10 "Annihilation"
11 "Beach Girls and the Monster" - suspense music [My title - like track 15, I don't know the names of the uncredited pieces of music]
12 Bo Diddley - Mummy Walk
13 "Evil Hand"
14 Frankie Avalon - Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea
15 "Beach Girls and the Monster" - spooky bongos
16  "Beach Girls and the Monster" Kinsley The Lion & Elaine Dupont - Monster In The Surf
17 Astronauts - The Hearse
18 Teddy and Darrel - Gary Ghoul Boy [pioneering campy gay humor]
19 "I am Robert Robot, mechanical man. Ride me and steer me, wherever you can"
20 Bent Bolt & The Nuts - The Mechanical Man
21 "HAL is Operational"
22 Ray Cathode - Waltz In Orbit [featuring a pre-Beatles George Martin!]
23 Buchanan & Goodman - Frankenstein of '59
24 Carl Douglas - Witchfinder General [yep, the "Kung Fu Fighting" guy; I literally did LOL listening to this one]
25 "Werewolf in A Girl's Dormitory": Marilyn Stewart/ Frank Owens - Ghoul in School
26 Frankie Stein and his Ghouls - Three Little Weirds [This sounds like it may be the song "Jerk" from "Lowbrow Vol. 2," only w/added crazy sound fx]
27 Bobby Rydell - Telstar [This song had lyrics? Believe it or don't! The vocal version was often called "Magic Star."]
28 "Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster" - capture of the earth women 
29 Travis Wammack - Theres A UFO Up There
30 Orange Groove - A Bad Trip Back to '69 [I think this song appears on the 101 Strings album "Astro-sounds": probably more budget label shenanigans, like track 26]
31 Lex de Azevedo / Doug Stewart - Zero Population [An ultra-conservative's idea of a dystopian future, from "Saturdays Warrior," a Mormon rock-opera - yes, there really was such a thing. Lex de Azevedo had a long career w/Capital records, releasing the Mrs Miller albums!]
32 Charleton Heston - "Soylent_Green"
33 Columbia Playtime Orchestra - "Rocket Ranger Song"
34 David Rose - Forbidden Planet [The man behind the huge hit "The Stripper" is a long way from the burly-q house here]
35 Count Chocula, Frankenberry, and Boo Berry - Monster Adventures In Outer Space

artwork courtesy of Mitch O'COnnell
 

Over Sexteen Vol. 2: Prudes Won't Think It Funny!

By a very wide margin, one of our "Lowbrow" collections of mid-century sleazy-listening sounds is the most popular post of the year, and several other lowbrow posts aren't far behind. Which is great, glad to tap into something so many of you wacky cats 'n' wigged-out chicks are craving, but I'm running out of suitably vile vinyl. So I've gone record-hunting and sound-digging lately, and this time, apart from 45s (and I have found a few goodies already) and recording otherwise-unavailable songs off of old b-movies, I'm also hitting up the comedy bins for "party albums" - naughty humor sold under record counters to, er, "sophisticated" adults. A lot of them just feature lame stand-up comedy that you don't need to hear more than once, even if that, but sometimes even these records have a good musical track or two.

And then there's this nutty thing, just purchased a week or so ago. Based on books of the same name, "Over Sexteen Vol. 2" stars an uncredited stentorian announcer hosting dirty jokes, acted out with enthusiasm by some uncredited actors who favor silly ethnic voices, and actresses who use a squeaky New Yoiker goil voice. All in the service of sometimes funny, but very dated humor. The audio equivalent of novelty cocktail napkins.

What really makes this album, however, is the organ interludes that pop up between the jokes and skits. Sometimes the songs reference the preceding joke. The combination of all these elements add up to an inexplicable whole that is greater than the parts. I couldn't believe I was actually laughing at this corny humor as much as I was.

Over Sexteen vol2

Absolutely no information listed on the album cover, except the name 'Kermit Schafer,' the huckster who would later become very successful for his 'blooper' albums of broadcasting goof-ups. Some of those alleged mis-speaks and outtakes were bogus, recreated using actors. Perhaps the very actors featured here.

TALES OF MANHATTAN: The Cool Philosophy Of Babs Gonzales

In this 1959 album of rhymed poems set over a cool jazz beat, Babs Gonzalez posits himself as the hippest of the hip, here to school all you cosplay-wearin', video-game playin', indie "rock"-listenin' rubes 'n' cubes. This cat wants to pull your coat to, like, where it's at, ya dig?  A fun relic from the days when jazz was part of a low-down street culture, not today's boring, conservatory-trained "American Classical Music."

You will be forgiven for thinking that Babs was a Latina, going by his name and that album cover, but nope, he was a black man. Not much of a singer, he got by on sheer attitude. This album makes an interesting contrast to the Buddy Starcher album we posted last week - tho they are both spoken word over music, they're pretty much poles apart. Babs is everything Buddy wasn't: cool, cynical, urban, sophisticated, and non-white. A hipster, in the original sense of the word. If those two ever met, like matter and anti-matter, they might have annihilated each other.

Tales Of Manhattan: The Cool Philosophy Of Babs Gonzales

A1	The Hat Box Chicks
A2	Broadway - 4 A.M.
A3	You Need Connections
A4	'Dem Resolution Liars
A5	Manhattan Fable
B1	'Dem Jive New Yorkers
B2	The Squares
B3	A Dollar Is Your Only Friend
B4	The Cool Cat's Philosophy
B5	Ole Braggin' Freddie

I have no beef with today's trendy urban youth, they got their own thing. I just wish they hadn't stolen the word "hipster," esp. since they don't even seem to like it. In Bab's day, you had to earn that designation. After all, he named his memoirs "I Paid My Dues." The hip scene was a secret underworld society. They needed these code words, as this was the era before the civil rights/black power movement, and long before the decriminalization of, er, "reefers" ("tea," "gage," etc). In these songs you'll hear such slang expressions as: 

Cadillac boys = pimps
frail = girl
pound = $5 (a lot of money in those days)
black and whites = night and days
vine = a suit of clothes
long green = lots of money

Still can't figure the lingo? For further research, digeth:

Cab Calloway's Jive Dictionary

Slim Gailard's Vout-o-Reenee Dictionary

Del Close & John Brent: "How To Speak Hip" (booklet)
                               "                                  (album - individual mp3s)
                               "                                  (album)

Which is all well and good, but what's the lingo for modern life? We need words for: computers, the internet, blogs, cell phones; synthesizers, CDs, mp3s; gays and alternate lifestyle stuff; etc., etc., etc. Come on, you real hipsters, start coining!