A DRUM MACHINE...BUT NOT THAT KIND OF DRUM MACHINE

Jens Peterson Berger of the great Swedish band Originalljudet has built a crazy contraption that puts a new spin on the term "drum machine" - this ain't no TR-808, folks, but a large robotic acoustic drum playing thingie (I want!), as demonstrated here:

Which is then joined by an orchestra for some lovely robo-classical musics:

Another fine example of human musicians jamming with homemade gizmos, a la Frank Pahl, and Pierre Bastien.

COVER THE EARTH 3: More Bizarro Versions of Your Favorite Oldies From Across the World Wide Weird

The first "Cover The Earth" collection we posted here a couple of weeks ago has been quite the success - twice as many downloads as usual for these parts. And since some of you nice maniacs out there have been emailing me mp3s and suggestions for other foreign/ethnic cover tunes, I was inspired to dig thru my cd archives and come up another volume. And this batch is really nuts, more out-there then Vol. 1, I'd say, sometimes veering pretty far from the originals. The versions of "Love Is Like An Itching In My Heart" and "Imagine," in particular, are especially retarded.

Ingredients: a version of The Champs' "Tequila" by an out-of-control Indian wedding brass band; "Rock Around The Clock" played on a Spike Jones-like honk-horn novelty instrument (pictured right); two salsa artists (Celia Cruz, Manny Manuel) who start off fairly faithful to the originals, apart from singing in Spanish, before pushing the songs into Afro-Latin territory that has nothing to do with the original songs; a Frenchy version of "Witchy Woman" on musical saw (just about the only way I can take The Eagles); lots of Beatles, inc. a small taste of the zillions of Beatles covers recorded by Jamaican reggae artists in the Sixties; more Tuvan throat-singing; an early-'80s Dutch track (RTC) that would have fit on one of my "New Wave Covers" collections; and  "Purple Haze" on bagpipes. What more could you ask for?!

COVER THE EARTH 3

1. Tokyo Panorama Mambo Boys (Japan/Afro-Cuban) - James Bond theme
2. Tobi Rix (Netherlands) - Toeteriks-boogie [Bill Haley & Comets "Rock Around The Clock"]
3. Tanh Nam Teu (Vietnam) - Bat Ghen [Theme From 'Bonanza']
4. Babu Band (India) - Tequila
5. pedro de la hoya (Spanish, tho he's French) - kiss kong five [Prince "Kiss"]
6. Celia Cruz (Cuban) - Yo Viviré [Gloria Gaynor "I Will Survive"]
7. The Presidents (Germany) - Love Bug [Supremes "Love Is Like An Itching"]
8. Bugotak (Tuva) - Kon Togethy [The Beatles - Come Together]
9. Alton Ellis (Jamaica) - And I Love Her
10. Charlotte Dada (Ghana) - Don't Let Me Down
11. RTC (Holland) - Drive My Car
12. cachicamoconcaspa y leyko el perro de la IIII dimensión (Venezuela) - Imagine
13. Keith Lynn, The S.P.M's & Byron Lee & The Dragonaires (Jamaica) - My Sweet Lord
14. Svetlyo Zhilev (Bulgaria) - Purple Haze
15. Yat-Kha (Tuva) - Love Will Tear Us Apart
16. Dan Bau Vietnam - Rider in the Sky ["Ghost Riders In The Sky"]
17. Manny Manuel (Cuba) - I Want To Hold Your Hand (Tu Mano Cogere)
18. Beau Jocque & The Zydeco Hi-Rollers (Cajun Louisiana, USA) - Hi-Rollers Theme/Low Rider [War "Low Rider")
19. Barat Dangdut-Terpopuler 95 (Indonesia) - Hotel California
20. Randall Throckmorton w/ Larmes de Colère (French, tho Mr.Throckmorton is from Minneapolis) - Femme de Sorcière [Eagles "Witchy Woman"]
21. Yat-Kha (Tuva) - Black Magic Woman 

Gracias, danke, thanks to DJ Dragan and Outtaspaceman!

Ergo Phizmiz's Nose Points In Different Directions

Tho I've written about Ergo Phizmiz numerous times in the past, I can't even begin to fully immerse myself in the brilliant British eccentric's ouvre: the guy seemingly releases an album a month. I don't know if even he's heard all of his albums.  So forgive me if I'm a little late to this party, tho I am familiar with some tracks off this 2010 collection - some of the songs, like the catchy opening ode to the scaly anteater "Pangolin", were from a collection he did with performer/scientist Irene Moon..  Yeah, I remember that one, good stuff. 

Singing about scaly anteaters - that should give you some insight into Ergo's world. Many of these songs meet your basic pop music requirements - short, catchy, sometimes even sing-along-able. But they are experimental, of no known genre, and loaded with British whimsy.  Banjos and kazoos merrily carouse with electronics, and old sampled records do the cha-cha with cartoonish sound effects. On "Daruckatekarte," glass bottles are struck to sound like gamelan over a head-nodding beat. The title of "Rock Me With Your Love" might sound like a bad '80s hair-metal song, but it's actually a sorta-bhangra banger with quoteably silly lyrics. It's followed by a lovely song for overdubbed violins, a kind of crude garage take on '60s baroque pop, a la The Left Banke. "Valse for Lydia" throws Groucho Marx samples over classical music, mixed with noisey beats. "Fuck The Free World" is downright funk-ay, even as it samples the voice of a woman talking about the voices in her head. And on and on...

Get your FREE download album here, courtesy of the wombnet label:

Ergo Phizmiz: "Nose Points In Different Directions"
or HERE, from the Free Music Archive, where you can listen to it streaming as well.


(A gold star for anyone who recognizes the "I wuv you" sample in "Valse for Lydia.") 

Snoopy's Beatles Classiks On Toys

Does what it says on the tin: Beatles songs played only on toy instruments. You may find this charming, or cloying and annoying.  Maybe both. I actually have another "Snoopy's Classiks On Toys" album by the same culprits behind this, an all-instrumental Christmas album, but I haven't posted it here - it's kinda bland. Nothing like having the occasional off-key moppets screeching, as this one does, to wake things up.

Yeah, it's those same Beatles songs you've heard a million times - but it's toys! None of this has anything to do with Charlie Brown & Co., near as I can tell.  Just a marketing angle, I guess. The cats behind this are French-Candian composers who have actually done some fairly serious classical-type stuff.  Tho this is probably just a commercial "rent gig" to pay the bills, it can work nicely, e.g.: "Here Comes The Sun"s arrangement for toy piano, xylophone, and chimes, among other sounds.

Robert Lafond and Michael Laverdiere: "Snoopy's Beatles Classiks On Toys" (1995)

1. Intro
2. Do You Want To Know A Secret? (Vocals)
3. Blackbird
4. Yesterday
5. When I'm Sixty-Four
6. Penny Lane
7. Here Comes The Sun
8. She Loves You (Vocals)
9. Fool On The Hill
10. Here, There, Everywhere
11. Help!
12. A Hard Day's Night
13. Yellow Submarine (Vocals)


Thanks to windy!

OUTSIDER MUSIC VIDEO SHOW

British comic Mike Belgrave has an entertaining series of short videos about outsider and strange musics. Even if you know all about this stuff, they're worth watching for the presentation - he's quite enthusiastic, and throws in funny visuals. Stop what you're doing and feast your eyeballs on these, you'll love 'em. Episode one is the basic background, and mentions Wesley Willis, Irwin Chusid, and misguided sitar covers:

Episode Two: The Cramps play at a mental hospital

Episode Three: Xmas special

Episode Four: "the mainstream side of life"

Episode Five: buskers, and performers he's met

Thanks to RadioClash for the tip, and thanks (?) to VideoPate for sending this atrocity our way: an elderly Xian hippie/Santa Claus type in Ventura County, CA, in an amazingly slickly-produced video (where'd he get the money?) repeatedly asking "What's happening in the world today?" and, not getting an answer, keeps asking for five agonizing minutes. Catchy tune, and hey, dig those kazoo solos! John David Orvis is his name and apparently there's a whole album of his out there. 

But it doesn't get much better/worse then this bit of jaw-dropping horror, dumped on the world only last week.  I think the title of this song says it all: "Thank You, Facebook."

"I'm tagging you, you're tagging me, we're making history."

COVER THE EARTH: Ukrainian Punk

As an addendum to the "Cover The Earth" post of bizarre international versions of your favorite oldies, here are various rock remakes recorded over the years by The Ukrainians. Peter Solowka, one of the members of the popular '80s/'90s British combo The Wedding Present, is of Ukrainian descent, and picked up on the music from his father. He hooked up with musicians from the old country to play Ukrainian folk music, but then threw in some covers relevant to his present condition as a rocker living in the UK. And it is some crazy stuff.  No wimpy hippie folk music here, thanks to the occasional addition of some of Solowka's old Wedding Present buddies injecting some rock'n'roll energy into the mandolin-and-fiddle based tunes.  By the early '90s, Solowka had quit the Wedding Present to make the Ukrainians his full-time gig.

Included here: the entirety of the "Pisni Iz The Smiths (Songs Of The Smiths)" ep from 1992, Sex Pistols and Velvet Underground covers from a 1993 live album, a 1996 Kraftwerk cover commemorating the 10th anniversary of the Chernobyl disaster, and two Pistols covers from a 2002 single. (They also have a 3 song single of Prince covers that I haven't found a copy of yet.  Anyone?)

*smacks head* Ah, durn!  I forget to include Googoosh's berserk Iranian assault on Otis Redding/Aretha Franklins' "Respect" on the first "Cover The Earth."  So here 'tis, as a most thoroughly non-Ukrainian bonus.

COVER THE EARTH: The Ukrainians

1. Batyar (The Smiths - 'Bigmouth Strikes Again')
2. Koroleva Ne Polerma (The Smiths - 'The Queen Is Dead')
3. M'yaso Ubivstvo (The Smiths - 'Meat Is Murder')
4. Spivaye Solovey (The Smiths - 'What Difference Does It Make?')
5. Anarkhiya (Sex Pistols - 'Anarchy In The UK')
6. God Save The Queen (Sex Pistols)
7. Pretty Vacant (Sex Pistols)
8. Chekannya (Velvet Underground - 'Venus in Furs')
9. Radioactivity [Orthodox mix] (Kraftwerk)

BONUS:
10. Googoosh: Respect

COVER THE EARTH: Bizarro Versions of Your Favorite Oldies From Across the World Wide Weird

There are lots of foreign-language covers out there, but what really intruiges me is when non-Anglo/Americans approach the material from their own ethnic/cultural background.  Sometimes it's kinda clueless, like the South African group who sound like they really don't know their rockabilly (tho I'm sure they know rock better then most Americans know mbaqanga), while others are clearly going for a cross-over audience, e.g. the "chutney" version of Arrow's soca classic "Feelin' Hot Hot Hot": East Indians go to the West Indies. I'm pretty sure the Bappi Lahiri track was no more then the prolific Bollywood composer finding himself short on material and thinking no-one would notice if he ripped-off some Western oldies, but Tuva's Yat-Kha, on the other hand, apparently is a big fan of Western pop, and performing it in his "throat-singing" style seemed like the natural way to go - a tribute to his boyhood favorites. And Panta Siklja Nafta might be the first reported sighting of Serbian outsider music.

Plenty here were done simply to cash in on the teen rock market that emerged across the world by the 1960s. Jah Division, and The Ramones bossa, and steel pan covers are just good old-fashioned gimmicks, but fun ones, and The Dragons have even been accused of being somewhat of a hoax - their release, covering the likes of The Sex Pistols and the Rolling Stones - was supposedly smuggled out of China after the band overheard Western music on Hong Kong radio, but some have levied the accusation that they were, in fact, Chinese folks living in France at the time, and a smart-aleck record label put them up to the task.  Who knows - the Pistols on traditional Chinese instruments sound amazing, and that's all I care about.

Cover The Earth

1. Bogard Brothers [South Africa] - I'm In Love  (Elvis/Little Richard)

2. Yat-Kha [Mongolia] - When The Levee Breaks (Led Zeppelin)
3. Yat-Kha [Mongolia] - Man Machine (Kraftwerk)
4. Panta Siklja Nafta [Serbia] - Nafta u Mojim Mislima (Ray Charles)
5. Wanderlea [Brasil] - Vou Lhe Contar (The Seeds "Pushin' Too Hard")
6. Bogard Brothers  [South Africa] - She Keeps On Knocking  (Elvis/Little Richard)
7. Yat-Kha [Mongolia] - In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida (Iron Butterfly)
8. Panta Siklja Nafta [Serbia] - Lav Mi Tender (Elvis)
9. Duangdao Mondara & Chailai [Thailand] - The Black Super Man (Johnny Wakelin & The Kinshasa Band "Muhammad Ali Black Superman")
10. Yat-Kha [Mongolia] - Play With Fire (Rolling Stones)
11. Manster [USA] - Over, Under, Sideways, Down (Yardbirds)
12. Bappi Lahiri [India] - Everybody Dance With Me (Iron Butterfly/The Troggs)
13. Glambeats Corp. (feat. Chepito) [Euro/Brasil/Carribean] - Blitzkrieg Bop (Ramones) 
14. The Dragons [China] - Anarchy In The U.K. (Sex Pistols)
15. Dunny Lida & Paradise King [Japan] - Surf City (Jan & Dean)
16. Jah Division [US/Jamaica] - Dub Will Tear Us Apart (Joy Division)
17. Babla & Kanchan [India/Trinidad] - KUCH GADBAD HAI (Arrow/Buster Poindexter "Feelin Hot Hot Hot")
18. Malik Adouane [Algeria] - Shaft (Isaac Hayes)
19. Mariachi El Bronx [US/Mexico] - I Would Die 4 U (Prince)
20. Tracy Thornton [US/Caribbean] - Rockaway Beach  (Ramones)
21. Sroeng Santi  [Thailand] - Kuen Kuen Lueng Lueng (Black Sabbath "Ironman")
22. Unknown Japanese - Queen Medley

Thanks to Dragan Vuković!

THE GLENDAS

"My friend and I decided to try to make a band where all the songs were about specific horror movies. We named ourselves after an Ed Wood movie and decided to record everything in one take, almost always making everything up after the record button was hit. In the spirit of Ed Wood, "Second take? Why?" By the third record we were incorporating our own movie ideas into the lyrics."

The Glendas: 3 Free Albums!

FOLK SONGS FOR SPACE ALIENS

Two free albums that sound good played at the same time:

Dr. SETI (aka Dr. H. Paul Shuch) sings songs about his namesake and day job, the Search For Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence.  Book him for your next party!  He considers himself a singing ambassador for the hunt for little green men, and his acoustic folk tunes, some parodies of oldies like Patsy Cline's "Crazy" or John Denver's "Take Me Home Country Roads," are brimming over with not only his deep faith in the existence of aliens, but with endearing enthusiasm, and an endless parade of hopelessly obscure inside references.

Id Loom's newly released album "Sonic Bungalow" is fascinating aural sculpture, a 19 track exploration of haunted abstract electronica with no beats, lyrics (except for a sampled voice on the last track), or traditional song structures. The "song" for sampled doorbells is particularly brilliant. We first mentioned Id Loom when we included a track from a different album here.

Although both collections stand on their own, I thought that they sounded like a natural pair when played together - songs about outer space accompanied by appropriately spacey sounds.

Dr DETI Sample Songs

vs.

Id Loom "Sonic Bungalow"

Punk Mariachi!

Just in time for Cinco de Mayo, here's a few tracks from L.A. bands playing...punk mariachi? How is such a thing possible?  One style is electric, fast 2/4 or 4/4 beats, hard drumming, modern, angry and cynical, and originally sung in English; the other is seemingly the complete opposite: acoustic, slow, in 3/4 time, no drums, traditional, and sentimental. Well, you may be a rock'n'roller, but if you've grown up in Los Angeles, you're part Mexican, even if you're not. (Like how Lenny Bruce said that everyone in New York is Jewish, even if you're not.)

L.A. rock has pretty much always been influenced by Mexican folk music. Apart from actual Latino acts (Richie Valens, El Chicano, Los Lobos, etc), non-Latino rockers have sported south-of-the-border influences since at least the days of The Champs' "Tequila" and beach-party bands like The Surfaris, whose "Latin Beat" is one of my faves; Dick Dale plays a mean mariachi trumpet when he isn't guitar shredding.  And it's gone from the '60s (Love's "Alone Again Or"), the '70s (War), the '80s (The Minutemen's "Corona") right up to this loco bunch:

Punk Mariachi! - A MusicForManiacs Mix (6 songs)

- Carne Asada "Cielito Lindo": White punks on jokes; this is their (piss-)take on the most famous mariachi standard, "Ay Ay Ay;" from their album "Full Contact Mariachi." Muy silly!

- Mariachi El Bronx: "Litigation," & "Clown Powder;" two from actual hardcore band The Bronx (Angelenos despite their name) who made a sincere transformation into mariachi, replacing electric guitars with horns; even tho they've retained drums and English lyrics, it's still hard to believe that these moving songs are by the same guys I saw convincingly play Black Flag in the Darby Crash/Germs bio-pic "What We Do Is Secret."

- Los Super Elegantes "Por Que te Vas": this co-ed crew was the first band I heard use the term "punk mariachi," but in a tongue-in-cheek way, I'd say - it's more like bilingual indie pop.  Mi mucho gusto this tune.

- Metalachi "Breaking The Law": I wrote about these heavy metal pranksters back in 2010.

- Mariachi Rock-o "Ben": This isn't rock, this isn't even really mariachi; it is pure kitsch; from their ridiculous album "Sonidos de Jalisco," featuring remakes of classics by Bowie, John Lennon, the Eagles, Marvin Gaye, and this cover of Michael Jackson's touching ode to a killer rat.

Boogie Woogie Bugle Buoy

"Chaos Atlantis is a real-time sonification engine, a program that converts ocean-marine data into sound. It is currently using data generated by NOAA buoy 46059 located off the coast of Northern California. This buoy measures several variables including water temperature, air temperature, wave height, wind speed, and much more. These numbers are used to control the parameters of Chaos Atlantis. For example...wave periods determine which synthesizers are used to make sound. The speed at which new sounds are created (tempo) is controlled by the wind speed. The frequency or pitch of a tone is controlled by the water and/or air temperature. The many permutations of these variables create an ever changing soundscape that is both fascinating and unpredictable. An excerpt [for listening or downloading - ed.] is posted at my soundcloud page here:"

Chaos Atlantis excerpt

So writes Missoula, Montanta's Ed Wrzesien about this intriguing project that doesn't sound particularly oceanic, but does sound plenty lovely, in a sci-fi ambient electronica kinda way. John Cage used to talk about removing the composer's ego from the music, to let music be itself, and on this, the 100th anniversary year of his birth, I like to think that he would have really enjoyed this, and the Sun Boxes we wrote about last November, as this is music not hemmed in by human time constraints or rigid formats, but music that just drifts unpredictably along.  As long as there's an ocean with waves, you could potentially listen to this forever (you can listen live on the above-linked Chaos Atlantis site).  The "composer" sets the parameters, and lets nature do the rest.  And, let's face it, nature is usually a much greater artist than us puny mortals. Other tracks on Wrzesien's Soundcloud page include a piece described as "...a sonification of data representing ice flow over the Ross Ice Shelf in Antarctica" that does indeed sound rather chilly, and a toe-tapper made entirely of sampled sounds of the Large Hedron Collider. Science can be fun!

MUSIC FOR SENIOR CITIZEN CAFETERIAS

Here's a true slice of Americana. 

Imagine: you visit a cafeteria-style restaurant in some place like Lawton, Oklahoma or Plainview, Texas. You get in line with your tray, get some meatloaf and some jello, and sit down amongst the old folks who are here to take advantage of the $6.30 all-you-can-eat deal.  (They're on a fixed income, you know.) Amazingly, a live music show starts, right there in the dining room. A couple about as old as the average patron of the restaurant cheerfully start singing old country/western  hits with live guitar, and karaoke-type backing tapes. The man sings lead, and on some songs, like "Tennessee Waltz,"  he's  okay if he keeps his voice down and stays within his narrow singing range.  On the occasional rock'n'roll number, like Chuck Berry's "Memphis," he sounds like your dad singing in the shower. As the show proceeds, his vocal stylings gets worse and worse, as he creaks his way thru songs like "Rocky Top," and a disastrous version of Marty Robbin's "El Paso." You're cringing, but looking around, no-one seems to be complaining. Actually, they appreciate a little entertainment.

Bobby Joe Ryman and his wife Jackie Gershwin are pushing 70, but, at least as of a few years ago when this album was recorded, they toured American Mid- and South-western small towns playing daytime/early evening shows at various Furr's Family Dining restaurants. This kinda thing is fascinating to me - life on the bottom of the show-biz ladder. Whether you find this album depressing, hilarious, pathetic, wonderful or a bit of all-of-the-above, you must admit that Bobby & Jackie appear to be having a more rewarding life than most of their retiree peers: "Being on the road like this, I just fall in love with everybody here. It thrills me to death, to be able to work out here." Sure beats shuffleboard.

Bobby Joe Ryman with Jackie Gershwin "Tennessee To Texas"

[Due to circumstances beyond my control, I can't use mediafire now. After clicking the above link, scroll down for a choice of downloading options. You may have to wait a few secs. We apologize for the inconvenience.]

(Thanks once again to windy!)

Clint East Woody Allen Alda

Last month, I posted two albums from the '90s, "Shaken and Stirred," and "Sub Urban," by Toronto lounge parodist Jamyz Bee.  A swell Maniac out there was good enough to send me yet another album, this one a winner from 1997 by Mr. Bee and his large crew of talented Canadian jazz cats.  No parodies here, tho - except for a cover of the Now-Sound classic "Music to Watch Girls By," these are all originals. The singing's adequate, but the performances are top-notch, and a light-hearted humorous tone prevails. Highlights include the cartoonish "You Put the Babe in Baby," with it's Perrey/Kingsley-ish sound effects and frantic Les Paul-like guitar, the name-game of the title track, the gogo-beat "Groovie Movie," and the cruel-but-funny "A Dog Like You."

Jaymz Bee: "Clint East Woody Allen Alda"

(Due to circumstances beyond my control, I can't use mediafire now. After clicking the above link, scroll down for a choice of downloading options. You may have to wait a few secs. We apologize for the inconvenience.)

Thanks to Anonymous!

Music For An Avant-Garde Cruise Ship

Here's a collection of new (or new-ish) pieces of sonic loveliness excerpted from albums now out for you to spend money on, most of it fairly low-key abstract ambient/hypno/drone instrumentals by composers of...what? "Avant garde"? That implies that they are at the forefront and everyone will follow them. Maybe that will happen. Or maybe they're off in their own little universe, too singular and odd to ever influence anyone. "New Music"? Well, that one's just plain silly. Is it still 'new' in a year, or ten, or fifty? Then what do you call it? "Alternative classical"? I like this one, since most of these folks came out of the musical academy. But when you're composing for a cymbal, or electronics, or microtonal guitars, or junk percussion (as all the folks featured today do) it hardly sounds very 'classical.'  We'll probably never settle this one, so let's just listen to some beautiful music, shall we?

Music For An Avant-Garde Cruise Ship

(Due to circumstances beyond my control, I can't use mediafire now.  After clicking the above link, scroll down for a choice of downloading options. You may have to wait a few secs.  We apologize for the inconvenience.)

1-2. Eleanor Hovda: "Centerflow/Trail II," and "Coastal Traces Tidepools 2." This 4-disk set (sold for the price of a 2-disker) is a revelation. The late Ms. Hovda wrote music that puzzled me at first - it's sometimes glacially paced, with long silences. The music doesn't seem "composed' as much as something that just naturally drifts along. I kept expecting ambient, drone, minimalism or chamber music - it is all and none of those. The first piece is for bowed cymbals, the second finds Hovda playing "piano innards." Not included here because it's 30 minutes long is an improvised piece played inside an enormous empty underground town water tank. My most listened-to album of the year so far, even at 4 disks.

.

3. Philip Blackburn: "Ghostly Psalms: Scratch I Ching" - Blackburn is the man behind Innova Records, from whence many of these tracks come. Like Hovda, he's an American Midwesterner (yah, hey dere!), which he salutes on "Duluth Harbor Serenade," scored for actual Minnesota harbor boats, and landlubbers, recorded in the field. Or rather, on the shore of the harbor. That's a pretty neat trick, but the centerpiece of the album is "Ghostly Psalms," inspired by old ruined monasteries, and scored for all manner of unusual soundmakers, including, on this track, something called the 'human rhythmicon."

.

4. Oscar Bettison: "Junk" - Wake up!  Amidst all these haunted atmospherics, here's a rocker.  I just saw this guy at Disney Hall, for the premier of a new piece of his that uses junk "found" percussion instruments, performed by the LA Philharmonic New Music group. Hasn't been recorded yet, but here's one from a few years ago by this Brit (now in the US) that also skillfully combines things like coffee cups, metal bars and wrenches with traditional instruments. Kinda long, so you may wanna skip to last third or so if you're pressed for time - it builds up to a fairly explosive finale.

.

5. Andy Akiho: "Karakurenai (Crimson)" - This debut by a Japanese-American writing for Caribbean steel drum touches on jazz, classical, and avant-garde - everything but calypso.  Effortlessly enjoyable. I guess it's just not possible to make "difficult music" on happy, sunny steel drums. If any experimental music could get play on cruise ships, this would be it. Album: "No One to Know One"

6. Christopher Campbell: "Sleepless Nights" - Like Eleanor Hovda's music, this album unpredictably wanders around with no particular direction.  Unlike Hovda, Campbell's debut doesn't feature long drones and silences, but a kaleidescope of colorful sounds, including, on one of the 'Interludes,' a minute-and-a-half field recording of birds.  This is the most 'song-y' track, a thoroughly eccentric mix of fake old-timey gospel, accordion waltzes, and abstract sounds. Album: "Sound the All-Clear"

.

7. Neil Haverstick: "The Spider" - Sometimes I think the old 7 tone "do re mi" Western scale is exhausted and music really needs to get into microtonal scales. However, when I  listen to contemporary microtonal music, I realize that the composers are not doing much to make it very accessible, hence keeping it in the tiny experimental music ghetto. (Sure, I like it, but I would, wouldn't I?)  But some of guitarist Haverstick's stuff is so cool I don't see how anyone could find it too objectionable - I mean, this piece is inspired by old sci-fi movies, and who can't get behind that?

8. Id Loom: "Sublation" - Mysterious ambient project apparently years in the making and only now coming to light. This track starts off with dense, rolling clouds of sound that part to reveal almost Gregorian-like singers. Strange and wonderul.  From the free download album "To: Atlantis."

9. David Lang / Sentieri Selvaggi: "Sweet Air (excerpt)"-  Lang's from acclaimed New York radicals Bang On A Can; Sentieri Selvaggi are the Italian group performing this lovely bit of minimalism for flute, clarinet, piano, violin and cello.  Sweet, indeed. Album: "Child."

Soft, Safe & Sanitized

This 1994 Rhino Records collection of narcotized versions of rock classics, like yesterday's "White Men Can't Wrap," was presented by Spy Magazine. Not sure what connection the now-defunct periodical had to do with old music, but it was a humor magazine, and this is some hilarious stuff: laid-back singers, sleepy-time string orchestras, and white-bread vocal choirs all scrub every ounce of sex, sweat and blackness from the once-revolutionary works of Little Richard, Dylan, The Beatles, Cream, Stevie Wonder, and The Doors, among others. As with "White Men," WFMU's Irwin Chusid was one of the compilers, as was Gene Sculatti, who I fondly recall from his KCRW show, "The Cool & The Crazy."

I have some of the albums from whence these tracks come - the shaky audio on Der Bingle's take on "Hey Jude" is there on the crappily-recorded original album (on which he also covers "Little Green Apples") and the Manahattan Strings' Monkees album is pretty cool, with a nice breakbeat on "Mary Mary" waiting to be discovered by some lucky hip-hop DJ. And "Right Now!," the Mel Torme album from whence comes this groovy take on Donovan's "Sunshine Superman," is a total blast. Hopefully, I can post the whole thing one day.

Spy Magazine Presents, Vol. 3: Soft, Safe &Sanitized

1. Louie, Louie - Julie London

2. Long Tall Sally - Pat Boone

3. Like a Rolling Stone - Living Voices

4. Revolution - The Brothers Four

5. Touch Me - The Lettermen

6. White Room - Joel Grey

7. Sunshine Superman - Mel Tormé

8. Ballad of John and Yoko, The - Percy Faith

9. (Theme From) The Monkees - Manhattan Strings

10. You Are the Sunshine of My Life - Jim Nabors

11. Hey Jude - Bing Crosby

12. Give Peace a Chance - Mitch Miller

White Men Can't Wrap

"Yo! - ladies and gentlemen - check this out!

White rap is a centuries-old tradition; the original white rappers were square-dance callers improvising rhymes for Saturday-night barn parties in America's rural bckwaters. Like today's rappers, they were seen as debauchers, imperiling the morals of the young. The fiddle was "the instrument of the devil"; church leaders banned it. The callers' freestyle rhymes teased with erotic innuendoes ("Duck for the oyster/Dig for the clam/Knock a hole in the old tin can").

The stuff they taught you in the grade-school gymnasium, that cornball mountain music with the do-si-dos - it was all about sex and forbidden behaviour! It was the roots of today's white rap culture. Herewith, a tribute."
Heh heh. The above is from Irwin Chusid's liner notes to this 1994 various-artists Rhino Records comp purporting to be the history of white rap. The presentation may be tongue-in-cheek, but the music is for real: an entertaining assortment of talking-blues, celebrity recitations-with-music, and oddball novelties from the 1950's to the '80s, many of which were actual hit singles. Fun stuff, from a grim Jack "Sgt. Friday" Webb attempting to be romantic, to all the country/western songs that were clearly laying the groundwork for such contemporary 'hick-hop' stars as Cowboy Troy and Colt Ford. And listening to "They're Coming to Take Me Away" again reminded me of what a truly deranged record that really was.

Spy Magazine Presents, Vol 2: White Men Can't Wrap

 

1. They're Coming To Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa!-Napoleon XIV

2. Ringo-Lorne Greene ("The original white gangsta rap track")

3. Try A Little Tenderness-Jack Webb (from the 1958 album "You're My Girl: Romantic Reflections by Jack Webb")

4. Hot Rod Lincoln-Commander Cody & His Lost Planet Airmen

5. Psychopathia Sexualis-Lenny Bruce (the famed 'sick' comic does a Beat jazz/poetry kinda thing about beastiality)

6. Big Bad John-Jimmy Dean

7. Full Metal Jacket-Abigail Mead & Nigel Goulding (Featuring the drill inspector from Kubrick's 1987 film)

8. Convoy-C.W. McCall

9. It Ain't Me Babe-Sebastian Cabot (from an entire album of the portly actor's Dylan interpretations)

10. Smoke! Smoke! Smoke! (That Cigarette)-Phil Harris

11. The Rain In Spain-Rex Harrison, Julie Andrews, Robert Coote

12. Deck Of Cards-Tex Ritter

OUTSIDE POLAND Pt 2: Mr Witek from Atlantis

Following up on last week's post (or whenever it was - I'm in buying-a-house/packing/moving hell right now) on outsider music from Poland, our man in Poland Piotrek tells us about Pan Witek z Atlantydy aka "Mr Witek from Atlantis": "... he is most famous outsider in Poland, he was invited many times to polish TV, he was a "star" of underground and punk festival in 80's Jarocin, and he wanted to be president of Poland, seriously:) His songs are f.ex. about Speedy Gonzales, masturbation, cosmos and many more."

Mr Witek is an older guy who vigrously strums an acoustic guitar and really hams it up as he runs thru Polish language versions of songs like Pat Boone's "Speedy Gonzalez," "Let's Twist Again," "Guantanamera," and that "Those were the days my friend, we thought they'd never end" song, and plenty of other tunes that I'm not familiar with. Even not understanding a word of Polish cannot hide the man's good humor and uninhibited personality.

Here's his cassette release from 2000, Side A and Side B split into two files, courtesy of the panmietic blog:

Pan Witek - Gość z Atlantydy

Strona A:1. Spidi Gonzales - tłist egien 2. Kuantadamera 3. Koń na biegunach4. To były piękne dni 5. Nie pijcie przed weselem 6. Noc poślubna 7. Mój koń nie mieści mi się w dłoń 8. Ela (a niech cię jasna cholera).Strona B:1. Ruiny Edenu2. Ty odeszłaś tamtej nocy z tamtym panem 3. Mówili ludzie: nie wierz dziewczynie4. Kiedyś zrozumiesz 5. Chcę ci dać 6. Idąc przez życie 7. Jestem kosmitą



Thanks again to Piotrek!

OUTSIDE POLAND Pt 1: THE SYNTETIC

Polish outsider music? Heck, yeah, bring it on!

Piotrek, a fine musican himself, sent us some incredible artifacts from the land of sausage and Solidarity. Today it's The Syntetic: a delightful nut who takes exisiting songs, like "Axel F," and sings his own lyrics over them: " Człowiek Widmo aka The Syntetic (in english - "Hollow Man"). This is the guy from Śląsk, who some years ago recorded funny tapes on his tape recorder for fun and for friends, and this tapes someone put into internet. And Człowiek Widmo one day become very popular. This guy was really startled but later he even had a few concerts :) I don't know if he is freak or no, but this what he's doing we can called incorrect music for sure."

The Syntetic.

"There is his opus magnum (from 2:05 he started to sing:)

He has great lyrics. I translated you fragment on this song: "Hollow Man"

He swimm on albatross

by the Egyptian sea

and he eat a sharks

and he burns like old pig

and he is invisible

Hollow Man, This is Hollow Man, this is Hollow Man, This is.

This is ungrateful man, and very bad

he is from the abyss of the darkness, of the hell

he evaporates like a water

he is invisible like a big stone

he is from the abyss of the light

Hollow Man, this is Hollow Man, this is Hollow man, this is(...)"

Someone has thoughtfully illustrated the Syntetic song "Hollywood" so us non-Polish speakers can get an idea what of he's on about:

Thanks, Piotrek!

Big Eyed Beans From Venus

Yes, Virginia, there really is a Captain Beefheart tribute band. Even more improbably, they're really good. And you thought tribute acts were all cheeseball 'classic rock' bar bands.

As the Southern Shelter guy says: "Big Eyed Beans From Venus have obviously put in tons of work (there’s really no way to half-ass Beefheart’s music)."

This Athens, GA crew even got actual Magic Band members to sit in, like Rockette Morton, who played on early classics like "Trout Mask Replica." Dig this 20 song show, recorded live, with excellent sound quality:

Big Eyed Beans From Venus 11/16/06 @ Five Spot

GONNA MAKE YOU SWEAT, MAN

Clarinetist/bandleader Wilbur Sweatman helped invent jazz, but before you start falling asleep, let me assure you that this 1918 recording of "Oh! You La! La!" is as nutty as it's title. Many many decades before hardcore punk, thrash metal, etc., this song is played like everyone's on speed, and everyones' speed is on speed. It's so crazed as to verge on incompetent, like it's all gonna fly apart at any second, but it doesn't, retaining a core musicality throughout. What else would you expect from a guy who could play 3 clarinets at the same time? Jazz music certainly used to be a far stranger, more entertaining beast then it is today. I'm including two versions, primitive early recordings being what they are. The second version, tho plenty hissy, is actually a clearer recording.

Wilbur Sweatman: "Oh! You La! La!":

Jaymz Bee & The Deep Lounge Coalition - "Sub Urban"

Following the "Shaken and Stirred" post, here's more from Canadian lounge parodist Jaymz Bee, whose 2002 album "Sub-Urban" features unlikely jazz/Broadway/bossa nova/disco covers of rap/r'n'b hits. I like this album a bit more than "Shaken" - it gets more mileage out of the concept. Like it's predecessor, it's lushly orchestrated with a gang of talented guest singers. Hearing cheezy white guys singing with a straight face about bling and bitches, and sophisticated adults singing juvenilia, will make you laff! Or at least smirk a bit. Not as jokey (or funny) as Richard Cheese, but more musical. Pick hit: the surf-a-go-go version of "Get Ur Freak On" with its interjections from some Jerry Lewis-type character, but also dig that surreal "Gin & Juice," and the campy Tony Randall-esque "Nuthin' But A "G" Thang."

Jaymz Bee & The Deep Lounge Coalition - "Sub Urban"

• It Wasn’t Me (Originally by Shaggy)
• Ride Wit Me (Originally by Nelly)
• Who Let The Dogs Out (Originally by Baha Men)
• Love Don’t Cost A Thing (Originally by Jennifer Lopez)
• Independent Women (Originally by Destiny’s Child)
• Gravel Pit (Originally by Wu Tang Clan)
• Thong Song (Originally by Sisqo)
• Get Ur Freak On (Originally by Missy Elliott)
• Southern Hospitality (Originally by Ludacris)
• Gin And Juice (Originally by Snoop Dogg)
• I Just Wanna Love U (Originally by Jay-Z)
• Nuthin’ But A G Thang (Originally by Dr. Dre
• Turn Off The Light (Originally by Nelly Furtado)
• Ms Jackson (Originally by Outkast)

Jaymz Bee and the Royal Jelly Orchestra - Shakin' and Stirred

Dig this nutty Canadian lounge parodist and his plethora of guest singers and different styles. This kinda thing was popular back when this album came out (in 1996) - is it time for the lounge revival revival?

All the songs are hits by Canadian artists except for whoever originally did "The Safety Dance," but I ain't complaining - the groovy sitars-a-go-go arrangement makes it the album's highlight. Up next: Jaymz' follow-up album covering rap/r'n'b hits.

Jaymz Bee and the Royal Jelly Orchestra - "Shakin' and Stirred"

1. The Safety Dance
2. Turn Me Loose
3. American Woman
4. You Oughta Know
5. Run to You
6. Closer to the Heart
7. Takin' Care of Business
8. Superman's Song
9. Spaceship Superstar
10. Born to Be Wild
11. Sunglasses at Night

The Most Expensive Album in History! Dan Bull's "Face"

UK's Dan Bull released a compelling rap album in 2009 called "Safe" that dealt with the excruciating life of suffering from the autism spectrum condition of Asperger's Syndrome. At the time I said "Can someone in England please put a suicide watch on this guy?"

On March 19th, his excellent follow-up album "Face" will be released, it's sole copy for sale for a mere £1,000,000. A bargain! But even if you don't want a hard copy, you can download it here for free, or pay what you want:

Dan Bull "Face"

Fortunately, he sounds in much better shape, bustin' rhymes on subjects that wouldn't occur to most MCs, like America's health care crises, for example. Life is still difficult, but as he says in the song "Medicine Ball": "What doesn't kill will not make you stronger/but at least you're going to live a little longer." The wittily-named "Portrait of the Autist" is an inspiring anthem, admitting that Aspergers' is still a bitch ("can't talk to anyone...My mind's wired a different way"), but he exhorts his fellows to "Be autistic and proud."

The music is as solid as the lyrics, with one exception: the corny "John Lennon," whose lyrics are simply strung-together song titles. Otherwise, Bull's flow is as sharp as ever, and the thing rocks from start to finish. For someone who's "mind's wired a different way," Bull makes a helluva lot more sense then most.

Scott Johnson - Rock Paper Scissors

There's a lot of sampling music out there, but very few composers work it like Scott Johnson - he takes snippets of human speech, and, as I wrote when reviewing the re-issue of his classic "John Somebody," writes original music based the rhythms and cadences of conversation, and makes those voices sing.

This album from 1996 uses digital sampling (not the tape-lops of yore) of original conversations of Johnston's friends asking others for a favor. Johnson choose that device because of the quality of anxiety and pleading that creeps into one's voice when asking to, say, borrow something. He then wrote music around these voices for violin, cello, electric guitar, and synthesizer. "Air Compressor" is my fave track off the album...but why would someone need to borrow an air compressor?

The second half of the album is comprised of instrumentals that, frankly, don't do much for me. I like his sampling stuff. But it's still highly original, challenging work.

Scott Johnson - Rock Paper Scissors

MARCHING BAND VERSIONS OF BLACK SABBATH AND RUN-DMC, ANYONE?

As I wrote last year: "I propose that we officially make March 4th 'Alternative Marching Band Day.' March 4th = March Forth. Geddit?" And, thanks in part to comments left by some of you good Maniacs, I've got another batch of alt-brass band goodness for ya this year. So put on your mismatched band uniforms and go marching around the house whilst listening to more spazz-jazz/non-guitar rock/Sousa-free tubas than you can shake a baton at:

March Fourth 2012

- Boba Fett and the Americans, a Denver-based band that doesn't appear to have any albums out, but I did find a few stray things on the web: covers of the Beatles "Birthday," Hugh Masakela "Grazing in the Grass," a 'Star Wars'-themed parody of Gwen Stefani's "Hollaback Girl" called "Bootie Hunter," and Run-DMC's "It's Tricky" (tho the vox are too low - you'll have to rap your own version.)
- Hungry March Band - these alt-march pioneers started in 1997, have 4 albums out, and I've got one of 'em, "Critical Brass," from 2005. It features plenty of jazzy funky originals, and kooky kovers of tunes like Black Sabbath's "Paranoid," as well as solid originals like the one featured here, "Jupanese Ju Ju." Bonus points for covering Pigbag's classic early '80s instro "Papa's Got A Brand New Pigbag."
- The itchy-O Marching Band (pictured above) are also from Denver, but could not be more different from the comedic Boba Fett gang. The 32-person strong multi-media group somehow march with hand-held electronic instruments like synths and theremins, and have a powerfully compelling dark sound. Their debut 6 track ep features tracks like "Inferno No Corridor," a song that blew me away with its gargantuan sound, like if Glen Branca wrote for dozens of percussionists instead of guitars. Bravo!
- MarchFourth Marching Band were the Portlanders that were featured in last year's collection and gave this March 4th concept it's name. Their new album "Magnificent Beast" features no kooky kovers, tho still has a sense of humor as evidenced by the 'SNL'-skit inspired "Cowbell." Elsewhere, the album ranges from James Brown rhythms to Caribbean/Latin influences ("Sin Camiseta") to New Orleans jazz. Unlike most, they sometimes feature vocals, often of the simple, chanted variety.
- Raya Brass Band: These Balkan/Eastern European-inspired New Yorkers have produced an album of absolutely crazed, twisted melodies over rhythms as difficult as the the pronunciation of the song titles. "Dancing On Roses, Dancing On Cinders" starts off pleasantly enough with the toe-tapper "DJevadov Čoček" (that's easy for you to say) before piling on song after song of head-spinning complexity leavened with irresistible buoyancy. Your head may be ringing after listening to this, but you can't possibly be in a bad mood.
- Seed & Feed Marching Abominable: this Atlanta combo have been around since 1974, which def. pushes the timeline back, but they apparently don't have any recordings. All I could find was an interview that features some generous chunks of their music.
- The Residents never used marching bands (that I'm aware), but, as a bonus track, I've included a song ("Washington Post March") from their "Stars & Hank Forever" album that remade the marches of John Philip Sousa inna electronic stylee, complete with parade sound effects. Sorta the inverse of the rest of this collection of trad bands playing non-trad music.

The Earth Not a Globe!

There really are people who think that the Earth is flat, just like it says in the Bible, regardless of what you see in pictures from space. Obviously, those pictures were faked. By who? By...The Conspiracy, of course. I believe that the Flat Earth Society were thus the first to promote that moonlanding-was-faked nonsense.

Which brings us to Lady Blount. Wiki sez: "Lady Elizabeth Blount, wife of the explorer Sir Walter de Sodington Blount, established a Universal Zetetic Society, whose objective was "the propagation of knowledge related to Natural Cosmogony [the creation of the world] in confirmation of the Holy Scriptures, based on practical scientific investigation". The society published a magazine entitled The Earth Not a Globe Review, and remained active well into the early part of the 20th century. A flat Earth journal, Earth: a Monthly Magazine of Sense and Science, was published between 1901–1904, edited by Lady Blount."


The Flat Earth Society message board posted a song written by Lady Blount from her 1898 book Adrian Galilio; a Songwriter's Story, described as "a unique combination of prose, poetry, illustration, drama and sheet music. And now, 112 years after its publication, the Society is very proud to present 'Star-Dream', a song from Adrian Galilio, as performed by The Nordic Countess, Ingeborg and with the help of gotham from our very own TFES forums! As far as we know it has never been recorded before, so this is truly something special."

The song, a pleasant piano/violin instro (durn, no lyrics about the Flat Earth) is now off-line, so I'm a-postin' it here. Couldn't find any info anywhere on the performers Ingeborg and gotham, but there's a slightly lo-fi, somewhat off-kilter feel to this that I like.

Lady Blount "Star-Dream":