"I've Got To Do My Penis Thing": Mr Fab's Mania For Maniacs

I usually update this blog every few days. It's been weeks since my last post, but I think I've got a pretty good excuse: I was sick to the point of (temporary) (I hope) madness. Two trips to my doctors' office, two visits to the emergency room, a high fever that ran for weeks, delusions, hallucinations, fever dreams...welcome to hell, enjoy your ride!

This is going to sound like a joke or something, but I really was tortured one restless night by a reoccurring punchline made by comedy writer Andy Breckman on his WFMU radio show "7 Second Delay": "Is this going to be a long story?" I don't remember what the set-up to the joke was, but Breckman's voice delivering that line kept bouncing around my head like a pinball in a pinball machine. I know this sounds funny, but I thought I was going nuts. I was also tormented for what seemed like several days by a song from my daughter's favorite show, "Yo Gabba Gabba!" Excellent kiddie fare, but I couldn't get the song out of my head, even deliberately trying to replace it with another, more innocuous one by humming something else whenever the bad song came back.

Brian WIlson recorded the noise-fest "Mrs O'Learly's Cow" with the Beach Boys to replicate the sounds in his head (as he said) when he was on the verge of a mental collapse in 1966. This is an unreleased bootleg, which I prefer to the cleaner official version Wilson released on his "Smile" album from a few years back. I thought of this track often during my illness, knowing, if even for a brief period, what Wilson was going thru:

After taking medication for a headache that left me unable to sleep and clutching my head like a Joan Crawford melodrama, I suffered an allergic reaction that had me sticking out my tongue as far out as it could go. Painful, tho it probably looked kinda funny, like Gilligan after a witch-doctor put a curse on him. This was alternated with my jaw clenching down so tight I couldn't open my mouth, and had difficulty breathing. Which did not look funny. Scared the poop out of me and my wife.

At one point in the hospital I started taking off my pants. My wife asked what I was doing. I replied "I've got to do my penis thing," apparently referring to peeing in a cup for a urine test...which I had already done. Fortunately, Mrs Fab convinced me of this, and thus spared me from soiling the exam room. Once I was furiously pounding away at my iPad, then gave up my internet search. Mrs Fab saw that I had been searching for something like "zxcvcxznnx nxcvbmvcxcvv." Apparently, I couldn't find it. So I sternly asked her to tell me "the story of the sick boy." I also said to her at some point, "They're giving me three-to-one odds," and left it at that. And I repeatedly grasped at things that weren't there, then was surprised to find that I had been grasping at air. I swear I saw 'em...

This is what my wife told me, as I don't remember most of these episodes. I'd always thought of the mentally ill - those poor souls pushing shopping carts down the street, mumbling to themselves - and folks like me as being poles apart. It's pretty alarming, then, to find how quickly and easily I slid into a li'l bit o' madness. It's been over three weeks since it started and lemme tell you, am I glad to be here. I appreciate simple things like a good nights' sleep and eating solid foods. I'm not 100% percent, but, as the doctors never could come up with a diagnosis, I'm just assuming I'm getting better since my symptoms have largely disappeared.

This song Grant Hart wrote for Husker Du in 1984 for their classic "Zen Arcade" album came to mind on more than one occasion during this period: "What's going on...inside my head?!"

On the positive side, I've lost weight (The Amazing Mystery Illness Diet!) And I will one day return to blogging. See ya soon.

PYONGYANG ROCK CITY part 2

Part one of our attempt to penetrate the nearly-impenetrable culture of North Korea explored the "pop" songs of the World's Strangest Country. Today, we're getting all high-culture and whatnot, with one of the "Five Great Revolutionary Operas," "The Flower Girl."

The plot concerns a poor girl's attempt to deal with her evil landlord. Ghosts are, apparently, also involved. Supposedly written by North Korea's founder Kim Il-Jong, it was one of a series of operas "...intended to promote the communist ideology, by incorporating themes such as the class struggle against the bourgeois." Attention: cabaret singers! How catchy toe-tappers like "Covering 280 km Road after Leaving the Home Village" have not entered the standard showtune songbook, I do not know.

Mansudae Art Troupe: "The Flower Girl"

I guess I was expecting this to be more folkloric, like Chinese opera with it's clanging percussion and shrill vocals. It actually sounds pretty Broadway, all melodramatic string orchestrations and emotional music-theater vocals. Not nearly as relentlessly peppy as the pop songs. Goes down smooth, as good propaganda should.

Recently, She Walks Softly posted some amazing photos, and a link to a documentary shot surreptitiously in North Korea. Truly, some must-see viewing.

Thanks again to kitschstortion!

R.I.P.: Randy 'Macho Man' Savage

Pro wrestling legend Randy 'Macho Man' Savage just died in an auto accident, it was announced today. Which makes now as good a time as any to post his rap album from 2003.

Yes, you read that right. This ridiculous album makes no sense on any number of levels, but one particularly curious thing about it is that fact that it came out so long after the peak of Savage's (and wrestling's) '80s popularity, and the heyday of '80s novelty rap. By the '90s, hip-hop was mostly overrun by gangstas, and the dubious prospect of an entire album by a rapping wrestler seemed even more ludicrous by 2003. At least this album isn't quite as bad as the one Dee Dee Ramone made - one of the the world's great rock 'n' rollers was, as Dee Dee King, the world's worst rapper, making Vanilla Ice sound like Ice Cube.

Needless to say, Savage's gruff, mush-mouthed vocals are no treat, and his lyrics are laughably lame - imagine, a 50-something white guy rapping about chillin' in the club with his crew and gettin' with the ladies, when he isn't dissing Hulk Hogan (ha!) and boasting about his wrestling prowess. He even has a dead-homie song. The music tries to be relevant with hard-rock guitars trying to pump up the tracks like an athlete's body on steroids. R'n'b chicks crooning absurd lovey-dovey lyrics attempt to up the sexy romance (?!) quotient, and actual known figures from the hip-hop world like DJ Kool show up to collect a paycheck and perhaps inject some "street" credibility into the mess. Just when I start to ask myself, "Why the hell am I listening to this abortion?," Savage drops another rhyme so mind-bogglingly dumb that I find myself compelled to keep listening. Be a man, I tell myself. R U ready? Feel the madness!!!!

Randy Macho Man Savage - Be A Man

1. Intro
2. I'm Back
3. R U Ready
4. Hit the Floor
5. Let's Get It On
6. Remember Me
7. Tear It Up
8. Macho Thang
9. Be a Man
10. Get Back
11. Feel the Madness
12. What's That All About
13. Gonna Be Trouble
14. Perfect Friend

PYONGYANG ROCK CITY part 1

The more North Korea tries to hide from the world, the more the world becomes fascinated.

I'd never really thought about music from the DPRK because the country is so closed off to outsiders that I figured nothing could get in or out. Well, awesome new super-pals over at the Kitschstortion blog have recently sent us a treasure-trove of music that lets us peek over the fence into the Strangest Country in The World.

How strange is it? Dig this: all North Korean kitchens have radios permanently tuned to official government channels, and you can't turn them off. So saying these songs in today's album are the DPRK's greatest hits isn't really saying a whole lot - after all, you don't have much choice. But nonetheless, this first collection is what's rockin' the streets of Pongyang, which is pretty much the only city visitors are allowed to see (heavily escorted, of course.)

Musically, it's very upbeat, slickly-produced pop, ranging from pretty ballads to near-disco beats. Synthesizers predominate, with wailing lead electric guitars sometimes thrown in. Lyrically, of course, it's all communist propaganda designed to reinforce your love of country and Dear Leader.

Korean Songs 1 - Both Paektu and Halla Belong to My Motherland

1. Glad to See You
2. Spring of Home Village
3. Song of Bean Paste [nice Asian synth melody; and that title really says it all, doesn't it?]
4. Song of Kimchikkaktugi [musically, could be '70s tv soundtrack music]
5. Song of the Half Moon [suggests a dreamy '50s ballad or Disney song]
6. Our Nation Is Best
7. Reunification Rainbow [check that poppin' disco bass]
8. Song of Mt. Pukak [polka party!]
9. Reunification Tondollari [some traditional-sounding percussion here; absurd backup vox]
10. Ojak Bridge of Reunification [again, this could almost be a disco soundtrack to some sleazy '70s movie, until the militaristic vocals kick in]
11. We Are One [oh man, love that trad. percussion/"Star Wars" sound effects duel at 1:52]
12. See You Again
13. Reunification of the Country by Our Nation Itself [Rousing! Makes me wanna march around the room!]
14. Both Paektu and Halla Belong to My Motherland

The Guardian ran an amazing series called "Pongyang Goes Pop" that follows a music journalist's investigation into the North Korean scene.

More to come! Thanks Kitschstortion!

The Stooges Go Polka!

Well, not polka, but this group from Chicago does play instrumental versions of Stooges classics on trombone and tuba (and drums). No guitars, tho it does sound rather dirty 'n' distorted at times. It also sounds really, really good.

The Ridiculous Trio Plays The Stooges

01.No Fun
02.Down On The Street
03.I Want to Be Your Dog
04.Dirt
05.She Creatures Of The Hollywood Hills
06.Scene Of The Crime / Death Trip
07.Not Right
08.We Will Fall

R.I.P.: DOLORES FULLER

"Dolores Fuller, the onetime actress-girlfriend of cross-dressing schlock movie director Ed Wood who co-starred with Wood in his low-budget 1950s cult classic "Glen or Glenda," has died. She was 88.

Fuller, whose show business career included writing the lyrics to a dozen Elvis Presley movie songs, died Monday at her home in Las Vegas after a long illness," sez the LA Times.

Co-author of some of The King's greatest tunes, like "Rock-A-Hula Baby," and "Do The Clam," memorably covered by The Cramps. Too bad she didn't stay with Wood, at least professionally. What a power couple they would have been - his movies, her songs...

I AM NOT AND YOU CAN TOO

Vermont's Jake Lions Band have very nicely offered up to us an excellent free album of lots of short (except for one 8 minute track), silly bits of electro-Dada. The non-instrumentals sport absurd lyrics sometimes sung in Chipmunk/cartoon-ish vocals. Like Zoogz Rift or Big Poo Generator, Lions and Co. mix smart, complex music with goofiness, thereby keeping pretentiousness at bay.

Check out lots more of his stuff HERE.

Jake Lions Band - I Am Not And You Can Too

Joy DIVAsion

I should hate this album, I really should. I bet a lot of people would if they heard it - it takes Joy Division instrumentals and mixes them with pop female vocals, and that's just plain sacrilege in some quarters. But, damn it, it pretty much works a treat. The final track with Diana Ross sounds out-of-key to my ears, but otherwise Ian Curtis' psychodrama supplanted by whiny pop tarts makes a surprising amount of sense, at least on a musical level. And, actually, some of these idiotic songs gain unexpected emotional heft as well, propelled by the passionate punk-derived instrumental tracks.

Sometimes the whole ridiculous-ness of it all makes it downright funny. And, you must admit, "funny" is not a word usually associated with Joy Division. Got to give The Netherland's mashup master Oki (who we previously featured HERE) credit for such audacity. Kill your idols!

Oki - Divas of Joy


oki - Love Will Crush Us Apart (Joy Division vs Paramore) - video by Instamatic from Tim Baker on Vimeo.

VINYL-PALOOZA #11: Ya No Hay Beatles! A Mexican '60s Garage Rock Fiesta

Closing out this month-long trip thru record-land, I present one final goodie - a various-artists 1960s mucho loco trip thru my Mexican garage-rock discoveries. I found some of these in the little mom 'n' pop store-front Latino music discotecas (music shops) that dot the working class neighborhoods of Los Angeles. Some of these records were still in the shrink-wrap, apparently bouncing around unwanted since the '60s. I bought most of these in the '90s, so I doubt there are too many left by now, but one never knows, does one? The usual sources (thrift shops, record stores) provided the rest.

These albums aren't always solid gold - there are boring ballads, or songs sung in English that make these groups sound like just another bar band. But the right combination of teenage hormones, unusual Latin influences, covers and originals can result in wild, fun, Nuggets-worthy trash-sterpieces.

So here's an hour's worth of garage, rockabilly, crazy screaming vocals, cool surf instros, and (this being a MusicForManiacs comp, after all) a few weird novelties. Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Ya No Hay Beatles!

Los Locos Del Ritmo - Hey Joe
Hermanos Carrion - Todo A Su Tiempo (Turn Turn Turn)
Los Apson - Ya No Hay Beatles [I think the title of this original tune translates to something like "We Ain't No Beatles"]
Los Aragon - Tema do Los Monkees
Los Teen Tops - La Plaga (Good Golly Miss Molly)
Los Rockin Devils - Hey Lupe (Hang On Sloopy) [I have a great cassette by these guys/gal, but I can't be bothered with pulling out my boom box; in any case, Amazon has some highly-recommended CDs by 'em]
Los Rebeldos del Rock - Oh Mi Nina
Los Rebeldos del Rock - La Hiedra Venenosa (Poison Ivy)
Los Locos Del Ritmo - Si Ti Tengo A Ti
Los Apson - Viaje Submarino (20,000 Leagues)
Los Belmonts - Amarrado (Glad All Over)
Hermanos Carrion - Memphis
Los Locos Del Ritmo - El Fantasma
Los Locos Del Ritmo - Chica Alborotada
Los Apson - Twist Hawaiano
Los Hooligans - Despeinada
Los Hitters - Hanky Panky
Los Locos Del Ritmo - Pan con Mantequilla (Bread and Butter) [Oh, how the retarded vox on this make me laff!]
Los Crazy Boys - Corina Corina
Los Locos Del Ritmo - El Mongol
Los Apson - Senor Apache (Mister Custer)
Hermanos Carrion - Suzy-Q [throws in a bit of "Land of 1000 Dance" as well]
Los Aragon - Paren esa Musica [don't quit listening before you get to this absolutely hysterical number; "stop the music!!"]

VINYL-PALOOZA #10: Harmonic Synthesizer

We're stretching our all-vinyl month by a few days to accommodate this demo album of a 1974 synth (the only one made by electric piano manufacturer RMI) that featured digital capabilities. Wow, this one was years ahead of its time. I'd never heard of it, and I thought I knew my electronic esoterica, but apparently it was not successful, tho Jean-Michel Jarre used one. Sounds good, tho. I especially like the percussion effects on some tracks. "Non-pipe Organ" could be Keith Emerson at a cocktail lounge. And "Funky Wah" does indeed live up to it's name.

Of the three persons listed, only Mike Mandel seems to have had much of a career, playing jazz fusion with the likes of Larry Coryell in the '70s and early '80s.
Clark Ferguson/Mike Mandel/Carlo Curley – RMI Harmonic Synthesizer And Keyboard Computer
Thanks to Jake Lion, a cat whose own music we'll be featuring here soon, for the rip and link.

VINYL-PALOOZA #9: The Wisdom of Solomon

In 1989, Solomon Solo, a native of Ghana, Africa now living in Los Angeles, spent what must have been a big chunk of change to hire a large crew of slick session musicians for his vanity album "The Wisdom of Solomon." He did not, however, hire any singers. And that's what lifts this album from competent-but-uninteresting private press release to outsider gold. All the songs are Solo's originals, a blend of American-style r'n'b with some African influences, and if anyone else sang 'em, even with Solo's idiosyncratic lyrics, they still probably would have been fairly ordinary.

The opening track is harmless enough, but then we get the songs that feature Solo's high, thin-to-screechy and

frequently off-pitch singing that is nevertheless full of sincerity and passion - he means these songs. And some of the songwriting actually is catchy - the title song has a pretty interesting West African feel to it, and I get "White Doves of Seville" (my favorite track) stuck in my head for days, even if Solos' voice causes me to occasionally wince.

The Wisdom of Solomon

And I like his quote on the back cover: "To understand proverbs and parables is to have wisdom and understanding." So...to have understanding is to have understanding..?

VINYL-PALOOZA #8: The Occult Organ of Jimmy Rhodes

Late at night, when it's all quiet, the lights are low, cocktail in hand, nothing hits the spot like old organ records - cool, creepy, atmospheric...wistfully nostalgic and romantic, but with a darkness. Best played low in the background. Aaah...

This album sounds like the way it's '40s-ish noir album cover looks, only it was recorded in the late '60s/early '70s. Mr. Rhodes was clearly way out of step with the psychedelic generation, which isn't too surprising: according to his bio (the only thing on the 'net I could find about the guy) he went on to play with Lawrence Welk and made Christian records with his wife.

Jimmy Rhodes "My Best To You"

01 My Best To You
02 Around The World
03 Moritat (Mack The Knife)
04 Beyond The Reef-Hawaiian Wedding Song
05 Lies-The Glory Of Love
06 Alley Cat
07 The Blue Skirt Waltz-The River Seine
08 Miss You
09 Til Tomorrow-Goodnight My Someone
10 The 3rd Man Theme
11 Do You Ever Think Of Me-You Were Meant For Me
12 Avalon-The Sheik Of Araby
13 Que Sera Sera
14 The Portuguese Washerwoman
I featured other occult organs on my "Strange Interludes" collection.
This has been another fine windbag contribution.

M4M Returns To Radio Misterioso

I'm back guest dj-ing for another two hours of audio oddities on Greg "Spacebrother" Bishop's Radio Misterioso this Sunday, April 24, 8-10 pm Pacific Standard Time, on Killradio.org. Maybe it'll be archived, maybe not, so ya gotta listen, awright?

VINYL-PALOOZA #7: Music For Tree-Huggers

If you like trees - I mean, if you really like trees - well, today's your lucky day: here's an entire album's worth of songs about our leafy, barky buddies, courtesy of the US Dept. of Agriculture. Your tax dollars at work! Released in connection with the Bicentennial in 1976 (not sure what the connection is there, but, oh well) folkie Ray Schmitt and the Free State String Band play original, painfully earnest songs with lines like "Have you ever seen a tree cry? Well I did/Have you ever heard it sigh? well, I did." Beavis and Butthead's hippie teacher Mr. Van Dreesen probably has this album. On 8 track.

Just as I was starting to zone out from all the mellow vibes, along comes the song "Just A Tree," a kind of funky jazz rap song about all the things we make out of trees, with multiple vocalists, including children. Cool! And "Imagine," (not the John Lennon song) is really cool - a psychedelic jazz trip-out, with Yma Sumac-ish soaring female vocals. Imagine...Alice Coltrane making

public service announcements. I guess they ran out of ideas for more tree songs because the last two tracks are wild bluegrass instrumental jamz, played so fast I thought I had the turntable on the wrong speed. Can't blame 'em for the filler tho - I mean, how many songs about trees can one write?

 Ray Schmitt and the Free State String Band "A Forest Is..."

Schmitt is still around, mostly making documentary films, but he has a few CDs for sale as well on his site. Since we just had Earth Day, and Arbor Day is coming up (hey, remember Arbor Day?) if there was ever a time to listen to an album like this, this would be it.

Thanks again, windbag!

VINYL-PALOOZA #6: Golden Half 2

Continuing our month-long project of only posting old records previously unshared in blog-land, let's remember Japan's pre-tsunami better days. This early '70s girl-group release is full of upbeat, hap-hap-happy songs, and slick bubblegum production. These gals were probably picked more for how they looked in swimsuits then for their singing abilities - their vocals are okay, they don't harmonize, just all sing in unison. But they're cute, so who cares! And they cover the Partridge Family's "I Think I Love You" and "Proud Mary," sing in both English and Japanese, go Hawaiian and Latin, and cover an absolutely killer Lee Hazelwood song called "Movin'" that I've never encountered anywhere else. Seriously, If any of y'all can tell me anything else about this giddy gem of bubblegum Moog a-go-go, I'd be much obliged. I've looked up all of Hazelwood's albums on Amazon and can't find it on any of 'em. Maybe he wrote it for another singer? My Google-fu skills have let me down this time.

Golden Half 2


1 Movin'
2 Here Comes That Rainy Day Feeling
3 Blossom Lady
4 Proud Mary
5 Mammy Blue
6 Hey! Kapten Fahr Nach Hawaii
7 Chottoa Matte Kudasai
8 I Think I Love You
9 Hey Jude
10 Rose Garden
11 Buttons and Bows
12 Mambo Bacan

VINYL-PALOOZA #5: Slaughter on Central Avenue!!

As a companion to the collection I posted a couple of days ago, "Hollywood Stomp," here's another album of old recordings dealing with Los Angeles, but this time it's every song I could find that mentions L.A.'s Central Ave scene, either by title or in the lyrics. These jazz and/or blues tunes are primarily from the 1940s-early '50s, and swing and rock like crazy, dad, crazy. The vocal numbers often feature humorous hep-cat lyrics, and the instrumentals are smokin', e.g.: the absolutely berserk piano on the Lionel Hampton cut.

Many of the Central Ave all-stars are present and accounted for here, from a pre-crooner Nat King Cole in his earlier role as piano instrumentalist, to proto-rocker Big Joe Turner, of "Shake Rattle & Roll" fame. The madcap Slim Gaillard (also featured on "Hollywood Stomp") drops by to pay tribute, as well.

The Ave. is a pretty ordinary-to-dodgy place now, but you can still visit the Dunbar Hotel (pictured) where visiting royalty like Billie Holiday and Duke Ellington stayed when they were in town. And you can hit the annual Central Ave Jazz Festival.

Slaughter on Central Avenue

Johnny Moore & The

Three Blazers featuring Billy Valentine - L.A. Blues

Slim Gaillard And His Boogiereeneers - Central Avenue Boogie

Pee Wee Crayton - Central Ave Blues

Nat King Cole - Central Avenue Boogie

Crown Prince Waterford - L.A. Blues

Pete Johnson - Central Avenue Drag

Big Joe Turner - Blues On Central Avenue

Lionel Hampton - Central Avenue Breakdown

Private Cecil Gant - Midnight on Central Ave

Herbie Haymer Quintet - Swinging On Central

R. Green & Turner - Central Avenue Blues

Dee Williams Sextette - Central Avenue Hop

Edward "The Great" Gates - Central Rocks

VINYL-PALOOZA #4: Hollywood Stomp - Los Angeles in Song 1920s - 1940s

While still sticking to my plan of only posting records this whole month (nothing taken from digital sources) I admit I got things a little wrong - today's post comes from 78s, and they're made out of shellac, not vinyl. Oh, whatever, this is all utterly wonderful music no matter what it's made out of, all from the first half of the history of audio recordings. And all the songs are about Los Angeles, in some way. Interesting that the name "Los Angeles" is almost never used - "Hollywood" and "California" were the magic words, apparently.

There's a real warm, uplifting, and, dare I say, glamorous feel to these tunes, some of which are also very funny and/or a bit odd. Click on the artist name for info on them, if any.

Hollywood Stomp - Los Angeles in Song 1920s - 1940s

Al Jolson - California, Here I Come

Freddie Quintette Simmons - Hollywood Bound (this and Spivey's tune are some low-down bluesy jazz)

Victoria Spivey - Hollywood Stomp

Spike Jones - It Never Rains In Sunny California (Spike's novelties were so imaginative, they were practically avant-garde.)

Felix Figueroa & His Orchestra - Pico and Sepulveda (Yep, the classic that Dr Demento played on his show for years is still the most perfectly strange and fun

ny record one could hope to hear.)

Joe Raymond and His Orchestra - Hollywood

Robert Clarey - Hollywood Bowl (This Frenchman survived the Nazis, and went on to star in "Hogan's Heroes"!)

Russ Morgan - California Orange Blossom

Cleo Brown - When Hollywood Goes Black and Tan

Slim Gaillard - Santa Monica Jump

Kay Kyser - When Veronica Plays the Harmonica ("...on the pier at Santa Monica..." Some of the most ludicrously silly hep-cat lyrics EVER h

ere; oh, and Kyser was the male band leader - the female singer is Gloria Wood)

Earl Burtnett & His Los Angeles Biltmore Hotel Orchestra - If I Had A Talking Picture Of You (The Biltmore Hotel still stands in the heart of Downtown LA, and is quite the ornate, opulant pleasure palace.)

Collins and Harlan - Those Charlie Chaplin Feet

Roy Rogers - San Fernando Valley (this singing cowboy really d

id live in the Valley, not far from where I grew up)

Hoosier Hot Shots - Avalon (These guys were almost as screwy as Spike Jones)

Modernaires - Santa Catalina (Island of Romance) (This vocal group is backed by Glen Miller's big band.)

Deanna Durbin & Robert Paige - Californ-I-Ay (lyrics as nutty as it gets)

(artist unknown) - HollyWood Polka

Dorothy Shay (The "Park Avenue Hillbilly") - I've Been To Hollywood

Benny Goodman Orch. - Hooray For Hollywood (You know the tune, but check out the rather sardonic lyrics HERE.)

VINYL-PALOOZA #3: The Complete Cockatiel Training Album

As we continue our all-month thrift-store record binge......Today's album was supposed to be played for your pet bird. It would listen to the repetitious tracks and start to imitate them, whistling and talking just like the record. Side one is nothing but unaccompanied whistling of short song fragments, repeated for three minutes apiece. Side two is great if you want your bird to talk like a bored, unimaginative phone-sex operator. The most annoying album ever made??!?!?!?

Actually, the whistling is well done - it is, after all, by Muzzy Marcellino, one of the biggest whistling stars of his day, back when there was such a thing as a "whistling star." The guy even did the bird calls at Disneyland's "Enchanted Tiki Room."

Did anyone ever buy one of these records for the purpose for which it was created, and not just as a source of goofy samples? Do they actually work?

The Complete Cockatiel Training Album

Whistled Tunes
• Pop Goes the Weasel
  
• Charge - Wolf Whistle
• Dixie
• Star Spangled Banner
• Oh Susanna
• Race Track Call
• Beautiful Dreamer

Spoken Word
• Hello Baby
• I Love You
• Hello Baby, I Love You
• Hey, Good Lookin’
• Want to Play With Me?
  
• Hey, Good Lookin’, Want to Play With Me?
• Hey, Good Lookin’, I Love You, Want to Play With Me?

Thanks to windbag!

VINYL-PALOOZA #2: '60s Guatemalan Garage/Psych

Mid-to-late '60s garage/psychedelic rock seems to be some of the most expensive collectors items out there in record-land, and the more obscure, the better. Well, see how many boxes this one checks: it's so obscure, there's no mention of it anywhere on-line that I can find, it's so obscure it's from, of all places, Guatemala. You got yer heavy fuzzed-out guitar, you got yer wah-wah action, you got yer sleazy organ, and you got yer original songs (no Stones retreads here), and most importantly, you got good songs. Some great songs, actually, with a heavy surf influence - a bit late for surfing in 1969 (or thereabouts) but, hey, they're not as trendy as los norte Americanos down there in Central America. If this can't make collectors cream their jeans, I don't know what can.

Side one kicks things off with a massive fuzz-fest that is virtually a one-chord

song, allowing Armando de Leon

Flores a chance to go to town on his guitarra. The cheesy organ on the second song practically takes things into Herb Albert territory (which is fine by me), and only by the third track do we finally get some vocals, and what fine harmonies they are. The 4th song is fast and frantic, but with a definite Latin feel to the melody, distinguishing it from the usual "Louie Louie" clones. "Luna de Xelaju" is an atmospheric waltz-to-rocker with evocative tremoloed guitar, and "Genesis" is another upbeat instro.

Plenty of awesomeness right there, but the medley that takes up all of side two completely shreds - from the standards "Telstar" and "Penetration" to scads of unknown (to my gringo ears) Latin American gems, The Electronic Fountains deliver as perfect an 18 minute set of garage/psych/Latin/surf as one could hope for. Whatever the tune is that starts at around 10:30 (EDIT: actually, I meant the tune that goes from 13:30-15:00), it's now one of my favorite songs. What more could one ask for? Better sound quality, I suppose - the vinyl's worn. But you're never gonna find a copy of it. Bidding starts at..?

ELECTRONICOS LA FUENTE (Google Drive)

ELECTRONICOS LA FUENTE (The Box)


 

VINYL-PALOOZA #1: Space Age Lounge Pop A-go-go!!

It's Vinyl Month here at M4M. Yep, in an attempt to pick up the slack after technical difficulties have kept me from posting much here lately, I'm gonna go thru my 12 inch black round thingies and spend the month featuring some weird old records of drool-worthy obscurity, lovingly hand-ripped from crusty old vinyl on to my new computer (Umm...tell me if the new recording software sounds ok, ok?) Record Store Day is coming up, after all.

We post all kinds of music here, but one thing we can all agree on is the grooviness of '60s Space Age/lounge/ pop. Albums of this sort have been some of the most downloaded 'round these parts, and this one has it all: futuristic Perrey/Kingsley-like keyboards, discotheque dance energy, Roger Roger-esque wackiness, lounge jazz, Latin rhythms, and sample-able funk grooves. It was released by the British library label Studio 1, who had ties to a German company, and I do notice some rather Teutonic-looking names in the writing credits. Otherwise, there's nothing else I've been able to find out about these most talented chaps.

The George King/Joe Corney Organ Sounds