Music BY Maniacs

Since this blog comes up near the top when people search for "David Koresh music," I've been getting comments like: "Does anyone have that "There's a madman living in Waco" song that keeps playing on MSNBC? I swear that's one of the catchiest little hooks I've heard in a long while. I can't get it out of my head! I'm searching all over the web for it."

Anyone?

UPDATE 10/23/09 - Got it! Thanks to Nile for the info. My readers rock.

David Koresh "Mad Man in Waco"

I re-upped the Koresh songs on the original post. Apparently there have been a lot of songs about Koresh: dozens, heck, maybe hundreds, according to an amazing site called Waco Songs. It's an old site with not many working links, but it certainly makes for an interesting shopping list.


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COSMIC ORGAN CHANTS

While visiting the exhibit of weird religious album covers I wrote about last week (highly-recommended, btw), I ran into Howie Pyro, of superstar mashup crew The Illuminoids (and that most Maniacal of podcasts Intoxica Radio) who informed me that, contrary to what I had written, he had contributed at least as many records to the show as Don Bolles. My apologies, Howie, I was just going by what the LA Times had suggested. Mislead by the mass media! Another first.

The exhibit reminded me of how many odd religious items I have. I was surprised - thrifting for tunes means coming across countless zillions of religious records, most of which get passed over. But I guess they can add up, even if you get just one in a hundred. So I thought I'd post some more from my archives. Yes, there's no shortage of scary Christian ventriloquist/ horrific child singers/ ranting preachers, etc. But here's a record I recognized from my collection (albeit with a different cover then the one shown) that's actually some nice listening.
"In the Land Beyond My Dreams: Organ renditions of Paramahansa Yogananda's Cosmic Chants, arranged and played by a Self-Realization Fellowship monk" is nothing but mystical organ instros a la '50s exotica star Korla Pandit, but this is from 1970. Ripped from a sealed vinyl copy I scored recently in Las Vegas on safari with my brother (thanks, dude!)
"In the Land Beyond My Dreams"

01 - In The Land Beyond My Dreams
02 - Blue Lotus Feet
03 - From This Sleep Lord/Do Not Dry The Ocean of My Love
04 - Light The Lamp of Thy Love
05 - In The Valley of Sorrow
06 - Recieve Me On Thy Lap
07 - Deliver Us From Delusion
08 - They Have Heard Thy Name
09 - When Thy Song Flows Thru Me
10 - When My Dream's Dream Is Done

Or dig this sample mp3:
Paramahansa Yogananda "Blue Lotus Feet"

There are verses printed on the album cover to accompany each song. Most of them aren't too interesting, but I like this surreal poem for "Blue Lotus Feet":

"Engrossed is the bee of my mind on the blue lotus feet of my Divine Mother."

Sing along!

WHAT WOULD JESUS SING?

"Within Heaven's Earshot" is an exhibit of weird, kitschy, funny religious album covers opening tomorrow at Synchronicity Space gallery in Los Angeles. Most of the records are from the collection of Don Bolles.

You probably think of Bolles as the drummer for bands like The Germs and 45 Grave. But Bolles was probably the first (after Dr. Demento) to expose me to the kind of non-mainstream, abnormal sounds that we celebrate here at M4M, through his long-standing (though off-and-on) L.A. radio presence. Checking out the album covers is more then enough reason to get me in the door, but hearing that Bolles will be co-DJing with his partner in sound collage Professor Canteloupe is the icing on the cake. And there will be "a filmed greeting by ventriloquist Gail Wenos"!

Speaking of Christian ventriloquists - From my own vinyl collection of thrift-store religious oddities, here's Little Marcy. She's mentioned in the LA Times story I linked to above.


Little Marcy: from The Jesus Story

Nothing like children singing about torture and pain, eh?

JEWS FOR JUDAISM

Here's a real outsider oddity: an autobiographical album of original songs and spoken-word narration from an elderly woman recounting her life as a pioneering female Jewish cantor. This 1997 release apparently came with her book of the same name, "Trusting The Song That Sings Within." Looks like you can still buy it.

Dora B. Krakower's singing isn't as horrific as, say, Mrs. Miller or Leona Anderson, but the spare piano accompaniment certainly doesn't hide her voice or pretty it up with lush orchestrations. You get to hear it in all it's operatic glory.

Dora B. Krakower: "I'm Pussyfooting Around My Age"
Dora B. Krakower: "I Keep On Trusting Me/She Calls Herself A Cantor?"

So if you want to hear an older woman singing about her "drooping derriere," look no further then the first song. The second tune contains the memorable lyric: "Shall I recant from the chant/ like a toady syncophant," which she pronounces "psycho-phant."

JEWS FOR JESUS

Jews For Jesus. It sounds like a joke, doesn't it? Jewish comedian Jackie Mason said there's no such thing as a Jewish Christian: "You're either a table or a chair." But they are a real organization, and, like most religions, they have music.

A group with the somewhat unwieldy name of The Liberated Wailing Wall (now, how are they gonna fit THAT onto t-shirts?) have been singing the praises of Y'shua ("Jesus" in Hebrew) since the early '70s, and much of their music is available for free (scroll halfway down this page.) Some of it still retains that early-'70s "I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing" feel to their vocal harmonies, but they command a wide range of styles, most successfully when they kick out the klezmer jams.

Klezmer is a frantic Eastern European polka-like dance with a punk-rock tempo. It's lots of fun, especially when it's a showtune-like bar mitzvah song about a young Jewish boy accepting Jesus. Kinda weird that's it's sung by a woman, but, then again, so is the entire concept of Jewish Christians.

The Liberated Wailing Wall: "Today I Am a Man"

MY TRIBUTE TO TONY ALAMO

Today's mp3 is the most spectacularly awful music I've heard in a while, a kitsch epic. But there's more to it then just that.

That's because today's music is by the infamous Tony Alamo, in the news yet again, this time for kiddie porn. The FBI raided his Arkansas compound. Sure, he's in the South now, but I remember when we had him here in Los Angeles. I discovered one of his tracts on a school bulletin board over 20 years ago and have been following the man's exploits ever since.

The tract was a conspiracy theorist's wet dream, claiming that the Catholic Church controlled all the major media outlets, and told every big business and politician what to do. As someone raised as a Catholic, I was outraged! What! I exclaimed, Where's my major tv network or magazine that I can control?!? All the years we spent on parochial school, going to church every Sunday, giving who knows how much money to the collection basket - why weren't we in on the conspiracy? Not fair!

Alamo used child labor to make ugly jackets for rich idiots, was wanted on tax charges, and fled town, leading the FBI on a cross-country chase that, at one point included stealing his dead wife's body from a tomb and carrying it with him while still on the lamb!

Like so many religious/cult leaders, he makes music, much of it country, with gospel-style vocals, all dominated by Alamo's warbly baritone. Doesn't get much better then this tune, which might be a more recent recording, judging by his aging voice. He bellows out the lyrics like a drunk hollering "Wind Beneath My Wings" at a karaoke bar, while the increasingly bombastic music overwhelms the listener, like a Phil Spector production for the deranged.

Tony Alamo: My Tribute - To God Be The Glory

His website is a monument to paranoid madness. A supposed Jesuit oath claims that, in their war against non-Catholics, Jesuit priests are sworn to '...hang, burn, waste, boil, flay, strangle, and bury alive these infamous heretics; rip up the stomachs and wombs of their women, and crush their infants' heads against the walls," and an interview with a mafioso claims that "Bush, the Pope and other top Vatican and U.S. government leaders had prior knowledge and help organize 9/11...to get their hands on all the gold that was hidden below in the Twin Towers." Golly! No wonder the powers that be are always persecuting Pastor Alamo.

THE CHRISTIAN RAMONES

"All-acoustic hybrid of evangelical Christianity and the Ramones." Can this possibly be for real?

The Christian Ramones

"Gabba-gabba pray."

JEWFACE

"The most offensive album ever made!"

Well, don't know about that, but "Jewface", a various-artists collection of vintage recordings, certainly is one Jewish stereotype after another, many seemingly perpetrated by Jewish performers themselves. These antiques, some dating back to 1905, were part of the ethnic stereotype humor that was wildly popular in the early days of recording. Apart from blackface minstrel shows (hence the album title) there was German, Irish, Italian, you-name-it, all performed with exaggerated accents and broad humor.

Some of these songs, like "When Mose With His Nose Leads The Band," are funny, but not in the way it's creator's intended - it's because they're just so awful! It's hard to believe this was mainstream American entertainment and that times have changed so much. But I don't think too many people will really be offended - it's all so good-natured and innocent, and we can't really judge the past by today's standards. And besides, this is such a fun tune:

Edward Meeker: "I'm A Yiddish Cowboy"

Speaking of offensive, here's an upbeat Ku Klux Klan march that makes the Klan seem like a wholesome patriotic organization mainly concerned with fighting Communism. Race isn't even mentioned! What a fine upstanding group of young men...

Johnny Rebel: "Stand Up and Be Counted"



Thanks to Spacebrother Greg for the Rebel yell (I don't even want to know where you got it!)

HEAVEN IS A WONDERFUL PLACE

Just heard that Tammy Faye Bakker has died. Well, she's been "Messner" not "Bakker" for a while, but she'll always be Bakker to me.

Most people think of her as the free-spending wife of a crooked philandering televangelist, but in our little corner of the musical world, she is fondly remembered for her contributions to the rich field of Christian children's puppet records, where grown adults sing the praises of the Lord in weird voices. These '70s/'80s records have been amply chronicled here, here ("Praise The Lord" is a particular favorite of mine), here, and this tune from Cool and Strange Music Magazine's Thrift Store Compilation:

Tammy Faye Bakker: "Oops! There Comes a Smile"

No new music here - some of you are probably well aware of these tunes - but spin 'em one more time for Tammy Faye. And ask yourself the question, is "There Comes a Smile" good grammar?

REQUEST-O-RAMA: DAVID KORESH

Another request to re-up an old post, this one for failed singer/songwriter turned successful doomed cult leader David Koresh. Unlike God, I can answer your prayers:

David Koresh

FRED PHELPS IS COMPLETELY HETEROSEXUAL

Rev. Fred Phelps has been busy since we last checked in with him. The "God Hates Fags" preacher's Westboro Baptist Church choir has lots of new tunes up on their site, including newly-recorded versions of their old hits like "America The Burning." That particular song, a parody of "America The Beautiful," has been renamed "Wicked Land of Sodomites" (subtle, eh?) and now features piano, better sound quality, and an outrageous new verse about an alleged homosexual practice that almost made me spit-take on my computer screen.

Westboro Baptist Church: "Wicked Land of Sodomites" - "That's nasty!"

Support the troops? Not this crowd - they have a song for each branch of the American armed forces: "U.S. Smarmy", "Toast Guard", "Air Farce", and, just for the Marines, "Semper Fi Semper Fags." It's easy for me to laugh at songs like:

Westboro Baptist Church: "This Land is Fag Land"

(sung to the tune of Woody Guthrie's "This Land is Our Land") but other tracks feature children singing. Yeesh, do we have to drag kids into this? Now that's distasteful.

Phelps and Co. must be happy to know that conservative preacher Ted Haggard, caught with a rent-a-boy, has undergone an intensive three week program to, er, "straighten him out." Which brings us to Roy Zimmerman. Satirical California singer/songwriter Zimmerman has also been busy since we last visited him, and recently posted a video of a wickedly funny new song, with all the bad puns, ludicrous rhymes, and Tom Lehrer-esque sharp wit we've come to expect from him:

Roy Zimmerman "Ted Haggard is Completely Heterosexual" (video)
Roy Zimmerman "Ted Haggard is Completely Heterosexual" (mp3) Recorded off the video, hope it's on his next album.

Now when's Fred Phelps gonna come out of the closet..?

GOD WILL F--- YOU UP

May the Lord be with you, Holla Back.

Mrs. Fab got me "The Hip-Hop Prayer Book" for Christmas.

Stay driven...He'll make the road clear
Rumble in the Hood? No need to fear
G-O-D is here
He'll make the road smooth...Ah, yeah!

It's by a 55-year-old white guy, so you know it's good. Supposedly there's an album coming out too, but we couldn't find it.

Who would have thought they'd find the savior
Not in a royal crib but chillin in a manger?

Ever wonder why there's so much religious music, but so little atheistic/skeptic/reason music? Especially considering how many musicians are suspicious of big institutions like religion. I think it has to do with music's role in religion, which, like church services, is to reinforce its teachings. If you take a naturalistic view of the world, it's shaped by what you and others have observed. But you won't learn the name of all the Hindu gods, or what Jehovah asked of Abraham, or what Allah said to Mohammad just by looking around. It has to get pounded into you through repeated exposure to religious stories and songs, especially in a pre-literate society.

A naturalistic world view doesn't have a mythology that's carved in stone. Actually it's constantly changing as new data comes in, so music wouldn't do much good. Like science textbooks, it would get out of date very fast.

It's getting hot! Getting live right here.
Rolling with God is like rockin the flyest gear!

Dan Barker is an atheist satirical songwriter, like a one-topic Randy Newman or Warren Zevon. He's released several albums, including "Beware of Dogma," available here thru EvolveFish. It features a brilliant track by Michael Newdow, the guy who tried to remove the phrase "under God" from the Pledge of Allegiance (who has a pretty interesting CD himself). It includes samples of profane voice mail messages left by furious Christians. They're not just dropped onto music, but are ingeniously integrated into the lyrics of the mock-reverent "hymn." The result walks that hilarious/disturbing line.

Dan Barker: "My God Is In My Soul"

Stick a fork in Satan cause the suckas done

Florida's John R. Butler is another tongue-in-cheek singer/songwriter. The chorus of this insanely catchy gospel parody gave this post it's name.*

John R. Butler "The Hand of the Almighty"

Let his righteousness resound, I'm about to shout
Cause every time I tried to exit he was there like Waffle House
Paramount in position, he's got it on lock
Its Jesus, Ripley's Believe it or Not!

I get spam almost everyday from indie rockers and I usually delete them, but this song title caught my eye since it fit with the theme I was working on here. And (god)damn it if it ain't a great one-minute punk surf rocker by a British band called ist, one of those all-day tunes-on-repeat :

ist: "I Am Jesus And You're Not" Official release date Feb. 14

The Lord is all that, I need for nothing. He allows me to chill...He guides my life so that I can represent and give shout outs in his Name. And even though I walk through the Hood of Death, I don't back down, for you have my back...He provides me with backup in front of my player-haters and I know that I am a baller and life will be phat...



*Thanks again to spacebrother!

DONNIE DAVIES THINKS HE ISN'T GAY ANYMORE

Well! Not only isn't Donnie Davis gay anymore (whew!), he's started a program called C.H.O.P: Changing Homosexuals (into) Ordinary People . Hey, don't laugh - it worked for him! Now he sings catchy acoustic songs like "The Bible Says" with the friendly sing-along chorus: "God hates fags!"

"The Bible Says" (video) Looks like Ron Jeremy hilariously trying to really, you know, emote.

He's also compiled a handly list of homosexual performers that parents should watch out for. A look at the list confirms how dumb (or just naive) the guy is. Apparently smart-alecks are sending him disinformation, unless he knows something about Jay-Z, Kansas, and Richard Cheese (!) then we do. He even lists Elton John twice, commenting that he's "really gay." He also includes comments like:
"Morrissey (?questionable?)," " George Michael (texan)," and "Ted Nugent (loincloth)." Yep, The Nuge, that right-wing "God & Country" conservative. I knew it.

I am prepared for the possibility that this is a hoax - it's just a little too good.

ROCK 'N' RAEL

When I was guest-DJing on "Radio Mysterioso" (see previous post), I told SpaceBrother, the show's host, that I had brought some music by Rael. He exclaimed, "Wow, I didn't know he made music. He's one of my favorite kooks!" Yep, mine too. As leader of the UFO cult the Raelians, he fooled the ever-lazy & gullible media by claiming to have actually cloned a human being. And doesn't he look snazzy in his white tunic and flashy jewelry, posing in front of flying saucers?

But he actually started his professional career as a singer/songwriter in France in the '60s before he got into the space-guru business. Going by the name Claude Celler, he made several recordings and performed extensively. An encounter with a flying saucer ended his music career, but he still records tunes occasionally. His style owes much to Jacques Brel. Despite the modern production, he still has that world-weary '60s French pop feel that I've called "existential-lounge." Only now he's singing about aliens. Specifically, the Elohim, the race who he claims contacted him with their message of peace and brotherhood. There's a page of mp3s of his latest songs here, including this one:

Rael: "Elohim" - Click on the title, & it'll take you to the download.

Any French speakers care to translate? Merci!

TAMMY FAYE SINGS!

Singing christian puppet records. Need I say more?

Disgraced televangelist Jim Bakker, make-up victim wife Tammy Faye, helium vocals, her puppets Allie the Alligator and Susie Moppet, 6 songs no longer then a minute-and-a-half long available here.

"Praise The Lord" for such terrifying/hilarious entertainment.



Thanks to punkrecords.org!