Tuesday, November 28, 2006

SCHOOL BAND FRENZY!!

There's no shortage of school music recordings floating around thrift-store land. Most are fairly tame and ordinary, but there's some real lulus out there, too. And "Newhall School District Spring Concert" is one of them.

This absolutely crazed recording features five-count 'em-FIVE elementary school bands, 157 kids in all, coming together to blow the roof off the sucka. The somewhat apologetic liner notes, presumably by music director Suzette Wenke, explain that they only had one three-hour rehearsal with all the groups together before the show. Almost every second of these performances feature dissonance, suggesting an extremely loud version of the Portsmouth Sinfonia.

Newhall is a suburb just past Los Angeles, and I'm guessing this was recorded late-'70s/early '80s judging by the inclusion of some music from the show "Annie." So big ups to the kids of The Meadows, Newhall, Old Orchard, Peachland Ave., and Wylie Canyon elementary schools. Play this LOUD!

Newhall School District Spring Concert: "The Bugler"
Newhall School District Spring Concert: "Dixie Showboat"
Newhall School District Spring Concert: "Two Minuets (Royal Fireworks Suite)"

Friday, November 24, 2006

'TARD-TRONICA, TROIS

More retarded techno, the last installment I swear! For now. You can actually dance to these, but any dj that tries to spin 'em will probably be pelted with rocks and garbage.

Barbra Streisand - "Shut The Fuck Up": Babs tells off a heckler in concert; remixed by Revo Lucian. Can't find any info on this guy, just got it off the ever-wonderful April Winchell site. Hey, I actually finally really like a
Barbra Streisand song!

Baracuda - "Ass Up": The absurdity of the anatomically-difficult instructions of the lyrics makes me LAFF! Baracuda are a German duo - he plays house music, she sings the stoopid words. This track might not be available in the US - it's not listed on American Amazon, but hey look! you can get it from German Amazon.

Monday, November 20, 2006

'TARD-TRONICA, TOO!

More electro-spazz tunes to make a raver poop his pants:

Bruno & Michel Are Smiling: "Faith" - Munich, Germany loonies scream distorted vocals over music that sounds like synthesizers dropped in a bathtub, exploding, and shooting sparks all over. You may hear something resembling Michael Jackson in this one.

Gravy Train!!!: "Titties Bounce" - If a John Waters movie was an electro-pop band it might be this gleefully offensive Oakland, CA quartet. Sometimes the boys in the band sing songs like "You Made Me Gay" but usually the ladies sing tasteful tunes like this one. Somewhere, Rusty Warren is smiling.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

ONE BANK

If you watch no other video this year, watch this one.

Mrs. Fab passes on tips to me here at Maniac Central, and she has outdone herself this time. (To quote the old commercial, "My wife..I think I'll keep her!") Today's incredible video shows Jim DuBois (Manhattan Consumer Market Executive) and Ethan Chandler (Manhattan Banking Center Manager) at a corporate function singing a version of U2's "One" with new lyrics commemorating Bank of America's merger with MBNA.

They couldn't be less rock'n'roll with their business attire and banking industry-inspired lyrics. But you can tell they've been playing music for years, maybe were in bands when they were younger, and never lost the dream. They're so darned earnest. The singer is truly trying to wrench out every drop of emotion from a song about...corporate mergers.

I often record the audio from videos I post here, but I dunno, I think this should really be seen as well as heard.

"One Bank"


Thanks Mrs. Fab!

Sunday, November 12, 2006

RIAA: "Dirt Bacharach"

RIAA Presents: "Dirt Bacharach," a 15-track download-album pitting the lush, sophisticated melodies of Burt Bacharach's '60s classics vs the sometimes harsh sounds of modern music and life.

Some are straight-ahead mash-ups. In "Birds,"
The Carpenters' "Close To You" gets twisted into dark satire. Others are complex Negativland-like sound-collages, such as "Magic Moments," in which excerpts from a documentary on inner-city children are ironically juxtaposed against the corny sentimentality of Perry Como. And then there's some silly sound-effects-laden novelties, and Alanis Morrisette gets a long-overdue smack-down.

DOWLOAD
(After clicking the above link, scroll down for a choice of downloading options. You may have to wait a few secs.)

Or listen to it streaming here:

RIAA "Dirt Bacharach" (thanks to however the nice person was who put this up on Grooveshark!)

There are apparently a number of torrents out there - do a search, if that's your thing.

SONG NOTES: (Many of the Bacharach instrumentals used are from the following albums: "Music Minus One: Bacharach For Pianists," Enoch Light & The Light Brigade "Spaced Out," Christopher Scott "Switched-On Bacharach")

1.
Birds: The Carpenters "Close To Me," BJ Thomas "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head," "Scientific American" podcast, NPR news stories

2.
Always Something Rollin': "Always Something There To Remind Me" vs Limp Bizkit "Rollin'" censored acapella, which sounded dumb, hence the on-line dictionary guest vocals

3.
You Oughta Shut Up:
"The Look of Love" vs Alanis Morrissette "You Oughta Know," The Cranberries "Zombie," John Bonham (Led Zeppelin) on drums, a wee bit of Dusty Springfield, sound fx, and Run-DMC saying "shut up"

4.
Reach Out for the Queen:
"Reach Out For Me" vs Sex Pistols "God Save The Queen"






5. Bite The Hand That Walks On By: "Walk On By" vs Nine Inch Nails "Bite The Hand That Feeds"

6.
Burning Wives: "Wives and Lovers" (performed by Frank Sinatra) vs Ministry "Burning Inside"

7.
Str8 Outta San Jose:
"Do You Know The Way To San Jose" vs an AT&T Text-To-Speech version of NWA's "Straight Outta Compton"

8.
I Hate Your Little Red Book: "My Little Red Book" (Love and Cal Tjader versions) vs Kelis "Caught Out There"

9.
I Don't Give Paper Mache: "Paper Mache" vs the censored version of Li'l John "I Don't Give A..." which sounded dumb, hence the sound effects

10.
Say A Little Prayer For Religion:"Say A Little Prayer" vs PiL "Religion"

11.
Falling Away From Bond Street: "Bond Street" vs Korn "Falling Away," "Twist"

12.
Guys In Love: "This Guy's In Love With You" (Herb Albert) vs Charles Bukowski "The Closing of the Topless and Bottomless Bar,""Love"

13.
Magic Moments: "Magic Moments" (Perry Como) vs public radio documentary "Ghetto Life 101"

14.
Beware of Poland, Baby: "Beware of the Blob," "Make It Easy On Yourself" (Percy Faith, and Walker Brothers versions) vs Foetus "Meet Me In Poland, Baby," NPR clips

15.
Knowing When To Put Down the Guns: "Knowing When To Leave" vs JG "Put Down The Guns," Public Enemy "Make Love F--- War"

Thursday, November 09, 2006

JOHN NORTH WRIGHT: UPDATE

We first wrote about outsider musician/would-be screenwriter John North Wright here last June. Today I received a note from FCJ, who writes, "In February of 2004, John North Wright passed away from complications related to leukemia, in a Hawaii hospital. John moved to Hawaii shortly after the release of his last album, White Widow...his personal site and related mp3 sound files were removed from the audiogalaxy servers on the day of his death. Songs from his final album are available to hear at
http://www.myspace.com/ripjnw

Friends Kill Friends issued a DVD of their "hit" movie, Suck the Cool Right Out, with a couple JNW-related bonuses. In addition to the original documentary, a segment of John reading his "Skatin' For Satan and Scratching for Survival" poem before a live audience as well as a recording of a play based off of John's works have been included."

I'm sorry to hear of his passing. But kudos to the Port Huron, MI crew for preserving his crazed rambles - there's some amazing stuff on the MySpace page, from old acoustic "hits" like "Teenage Volleyballers" to some of his last recordings performed on sub-Casio electronics, such as:

John North Wright "Down In The Land Of..." - Has something to do with Satan's, er, "schlong."

Mucho thanks to FCJ.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

'TARD-TRONICA!

Say, friend, do you think electronic dance music is sterile, repetitious, and dull? Is that what's getting you down, friend? Well, if anyone was crazy enough to hire me to spin at an electro night, I'd play no-good, low-down, tasteless lunatics like:

Leslie & The Lys: The reigning queen of 'tard-tronics. You may have chuckled at the video for "Gem Sweater," her ode to Midwestern fashion victims, but her live show blows it away. Leslie is a vision in big hair, blue eye shadow, and gold pants, and video clips between songs are a hilarious peek into Middle American culture - infomercials describing how YOU can attach sequins to your sweater, preachers describing the evils of slam-dancing, and plenty more. And she does her own stunts.

Leslie and the LYs: "Gem Sweater"

mmmmyeah: "Chavfeat": This catchy bit of idiocy regarding a girl with a host of diseases is found on this completely uninformative site. (Thanks to DaDa Hokmayen for the tip!)

Captain Ahab, Los Angeles' contribution to the genre, also have no shortage of tasteless humour - check out their filthy sex rap "I Can't Believe It's Not Booty" on their MySpace page.
But "Girls Gone Wild" is genuinely great. It's actually somewhat sympathetic to those exhibitionistic video girls.

Captain Ahab: "Girls Gone Wild"

DJ Scotch Egg was profiled here before we had even heard his music. His album's now out, and he recently played here in L.A. with Captain Ahab for what was billed as a night of "Retarded Electronics." Mr. Egg is a Japanese fellow whose "instrument" is a tricked-out Gameboy which he plays while screaming obcene rants about how much he hates KFC. Could I make this stuff up?

DJ Scotch Egg: "Scotch Chicken"

You've heard of IDM? I'll take 'TDM.